Confessions of A Different Sort
by Blossoming Nightshade
Summary: Something has changed in Harry and Snape will find out what. However what Snape finds is not what he expected. Better than it sounds. Will be SnapeXHarry in later chapters.
1. Surprise, Surprise

Chap 1- Surprise Surprise

The Slytherin and Gryffindor Quidditch practice was a success. Had it been a real game, Hurry's team would have won by 140 points, as it stands, it was simply practice. The strange part to Harry wasn't that Draco couldn't seem to stay on his broom, or that Ron had scored more points than usual, but that Snape was in the stands.

Harry knew that Snape had been following him for the last two days, but what he couldn't figure out was why. It was the second week of school, and Harry knew that he had not done anything out of the ordinary. He hadn't ventured down to the Chamber of Secrets or even gotten in a scuffle with a Slytherin yet. The only thing that Harry had done that could even possibly be construed as out of the ordinary was turn in his potions essay a day early, and he was pretty sure that wasn't a crime. He was actually hoping to get it back early as well, but no such luck in that department. He was rather proud of this particular essay; it was the first one that he put actual effort into.

After last school year ended he decided that he would start applying himself and not just doing the minimum amount needed on homework. Harry knew he was intelligent, he started taking classes at the local community college near his aunt and uncles house every summer after his second year at Hogwarts. Harry figured that if he wanted to get somewhere in the Wizarding world when he graduated however, he should probably show his intelligence through his school work at Hogwarts like he did at the muggle school. Harry had never once received less than an A- on any paper in the muggle college. Now if only he could manage in the wizarding world.

Snape watched as Harry cleared the field of the Quidditch supplies while all the other students took to the showers. There was something strange about Potter, in the light of the afternoon sun there was a strange glimmer surrounding him, like fairy dust that simply hovered there shining and sparkling ever so subtly. Snape sat In the benches for so long that Harry forgot he was there Harry walked into the locker room as everyone else hurried to the castle for dinner.

"Great practice Ron, I'll see you at dinner in a bit."

"Sure thing Har-er Captain."

Both boys shared a laugh and parted. Harry levitated the heavy Quidditch box into his Captains office and locked it up. He began undressing knowing that Snape wouldn't dare enter the Gryffindor Locker rooms. He thought wrong however.

Snape had entered and headed towards the captains room to talk to Harry about his potions essay. Snape was positive that Harry had cheated, but he was having a hard time proving it. If he couldn't find evidence than the professor would settle for a confession. However, when Snape walked in and saw the office lights off and the door locked he deduced that he must have missed harry on the way to dinner. Snape began to walk out only to be stopped by a well rounded and slightly deep tenor voice coming from the directions of the showers.

"Ave Maria, Gratia plena…Maria, gratia plena…Ave, ave dominus tecum…  
Benedicta tu in mulieribus…"

Snape looked around the corner to find a man with his back facing him. The stranger's lean, muscular body and tan skin glistened under the stream of water. His black silky hair clung to his narrow shoulders and every muscle it cascaded over down to his thin waist. Snape couldn't think of any student this could have been, which was just as well since he couldn't help but admit to the obvious beauty that this man was so composed of. The stranger continued singing growing slightly louder with confidence and not once missing a note.

"Benedicta tu in mulieribus, Et benedictus, Benedictus fructus ventris tui  
Tui, Jesus, Ave Maria, Ave Maria"

Snape left guarding the entrance allowing the stranger to bathe in private, then he could interrogate him upon exiting as to what the man's business was at Hogwarts. Snape waited leaning against a tree, hidden in the dark when the man came out with tight fitting and rather complimentary student's robes. Snape could vaguely make out a serpent crawling around the stranger's wrist, it was a wizard tattoo, that was for sure, but that still didn't explain what the man was doing here. Just as Snape stepped from the tree the man looked behind him at the sky

"Well, still and hour and a half until dinner ends. Gives me some time to fly and study"

The stranger pointed his wand at the stack of book under his arm as they floated n front of his face. Snape noticed McGonagall's Transfiguration text book laid itself gently in the grass after the stranger stated "I'm four chapters ahead in that. Charms isn't even challenging anymore, and I'm already fluent in Latin, no need for the beginner's book." another two books floated to the grass. "next year I'll just talk to my head of house if I desire a study period. Fat lotta good that'll do me in the world, Divination indeed." Snape couldn't help suppress his grin as the book Professor Trelawney used fall to the ground much harder and rougher than the rest. "Now, Defense against the Dark Arts or Conquering Potions? Hmmm." Snape knew that this student, since he could be nothing else, was a sixth year, but who was he? "Go with my favorite I suppose" Snape hated when people ignored the obvious importance of potions, Snape glanced a look and found the man looking rather perturbed at his broom on the ground.

"How am I supposed to practice my mind-only magic with this ridiculous glamour using up most of my power reserve?"

Severus was shocked, no 6th year, or student for that matter could do wand-less magic let alone mind-only. That was rare even for accomplished wizards. Though his admission of the glamour explained why Snape had never seen this student before. But why would a student need to use a Glamour? Sure the tattoo was against school rules, but really one could cover that up without dipping into their magic reserve. Snape was forced out of his thoughts when he heard a loud rather indignant sounding huff

"guess I'll settle for wand-less tonight instead. Up." The students broom floated into the students hand, Snape allowed himself to be surprised again, the student's wand wasn't even in the other hand!

"Time for potions study. Broom circumerro!"

Snape, was he less dignified, almost allowed his jaw to drop. That was no known spell, clearly that was created by this student, but what for? It took Snape a few minutes to realize that the Latin translation meant both 'hover' and 'orbit'. The student sat side straddle and opened one of the books he was holding as the other floated to the rest of the books. Snape didn't know many sixth years that enjoyed his potions class, no non-Slytherins anyway, and if the red tie was anything to go by, this student was in Gryffindor. "But where to start?" the student asked no one in particular. "Snape said the Wolfsbane potion was next. Seeing how I mastered that quite some time ago, we'll focus on Veritaserum again." A white owl flew from the castle and landed on the student's shoulder.

"Hey Girl, Glad you found me. No mail?" The owl nipped at the mysterious student's ear as he laughed. "I'm still having trouble with the truth serum. You think Snape would help me if I asked nicely?" The owl cooed "hehe, yeah. I didn't think so."

Snape was astounded, he knew who that owl belonged to, but this couldn't be Harry Potter, that just wasn't possible. The man lay back on his broom and floated around the Quidditch field studying his potions book for over an hour. Snape got lost in watching the mans tight robes and long black hair just brush the ground as he rode his broom, Harry Potter or not, this man was beautiful.

"Oi, Mate." Ron ran towards the field with Hermione in tow.

"Hey guys!" Harry's broom few up just a few feet allowing harry to gracefully hop off, his robes billowing behind him as he closed his book. Snape felt a lump in his throat and found it hard to swallow around it.

"Are you studying potions AGAIN? Harry it's, like, the second week of school and you've already read the book through….twice!" Ron's face took on the curious quality of looking rather ill. Hermione pointed behind Harry and Harry saw his broom flying off, he sighed and pulled out his wand.

"Repetivi! Conmoratus Sum!" The broom flew fast and stopped hovering vertically in front of Harry and remained hovering even after Harry turned his back to it to commence talking to Ron and Hermione. Snape allowed his Jaw to drop this time. Broom magic only worked if you were looking at or on said broom, and those were no spells that he had ever heard before. He did however notice that they were Latin for return and remain

"And, I'll study it until I understand them all. Some of the potions in there are very difficult to understand."

"I think it's great that you're spending so much time studying. But maybe you should spend some time writing a book of all the spells you've created over the years, You've created enough for almost two books now. I'll even help you if you'd like." Hermione's eyes lit up in excitement

"It's just silly spells Hermione, besides, I still have to work the kinks out of half of them, I mean Conmoratus Sum only works for an extent of about three minutes. Not very impressive now is it?"

"Not even Dumbledore has created as many spells as you have Harry! It is, actually, _quite_ impressive! But I'm not going to argue with you. You might want to restore your glamour, dinner just ended."

Harry pointed the wand at his face and with a sigh, he changed back into the shorter child everyone came to view as a savior. His hair was short and messy again and his tattoo was gone, the robes were about a size too big and his glasses returned.

"Really harry, Why do you even mess with that glamour? You could have any girl in the castle with your looks!" Hermione looked at him rather scathingly

"You know I wouldn't bother if it wasn't a direct order from Dumbledore. Besides, you know I'm not interested in girls." Harry looked back at his broom and grabbed it from the air.

"Blokes would probably fall head over heels for ya as well, hell if I didn't know better, I'd accuse you of being part Veela. Especially with the way my girlfriend over here goes on about ya all the time." Hermione slapped Ron across the arm as Harry laughed.

"Very funny, Ron. Besides, You know who I like, and there is not a snowballs chance in hell, part Veela or not. He always hates me, always will. Now, c'mon, I could go for some wizard chess." The golden trio started up towards the castle.

Snape was astounded, He'd learned so much that no one outside of his tight group of friends knew about him. Snape returned back to his office to write a letter.

Just as Harry finished beating Ron in Wizard Chess an owl knocked on the window and Harry let him in. Ron fed the bird a treat as Harry removed the letter from around his leg.

"Mr. Potter,

I understand that you are having some trouble in potions. I would also like to discuss your most recent essay. Come to my office tomorrow night at 9 o'clock in the evening. I will not tolerate tardiness.

S.S."

Harry Froze. But how did Snape find out- even if he was following him tonight Snape would have- Oh GOD! If Snape was following Harry all night, what did he overhear, or worse, see?!

* * *

Authors Note- Please Review! This is my first Fanfiction and I would LOVE to know what you think, even if its not flattering. Thanks everyone.


	2. Catastrophe

Snape backed Harry into a wall.

"You were late to class today, Mr. Potter. You know that I do not tolerate tardiness." Snape put his hands on either side of Harry's head and leaned down "Your potion, however, far exceeded my expectations. So today you will be rewarded." Snape pulled Harry into a heated kiss and began to trail his lips down to bite at Harry's neck as his moans filled the air.

"The usual reward then, Mr. Potter?" All Harry could do was nod as he saw Snape pull at the button of his trousers and get on to his knees. Harry watched as Snape engulfed his member in one warm embrace of his mouth, his head hit the wall as he felt Snape bob up and down on his erection. Harry's hands rested gently on Snape's shoulders as the ministrations continued at a more rapid pace, sending chills that pooled low in Harry's stomach. Harry boldly ran his hands through Snape's silky hair.

"Oh, Gods. Snape I'm close…no…don't get me off just yet."

Snape crawled up harry and kissed him, begging entrance that Harry happily granted, moaning as he tasted his own essence mixed with everything Snape.

"Tell me what you want, Harry"

"You" Harry replied breathlessly

"How do you want me?"

"Inside me…hard and fast…now."

"Gods Harry!" Snape cried as Harry massaged his professor's cock through his tight pants. Harry was lifted up on to the nearby desk as Snape muttered a Lubrication and Stretching charm while removing his own pants. He tugged at his own flesh wetting it with precome before pushing it slowly into Harry.

"Fuck! Severus!" Snape shivered visibly as he held tightly onto Harry's hips.

"Say my name again Harry."

"Severus" Snape began thrusting "Severus. Severus."  
"Merlin! I can't hold back much longer, Harry." Snape pushed into Harry repeatedly

"Then don't…Severus." After several hard thrusts with Harry repeating his Professors name like a mantra, Snape wrapped his hands around Harry's weeping cock and pulled in time with his thrusts.

"Harry-Harry-OH!" Snape stilled with one last thrust into Harry as the boy came over the now stilling hand.

"Oi, Mate! Wake up or were gonna be late for breakfast." Ron shook Harry awake. Harry rubbed at his eyes as he noticed that he and Ron were the only ones left in the dorm.

"I'm up, I'm up. Let me get a shower really quick and I'll be right down." Harry said as Ron went to pick up his book bag.

"Hey Ron, Harry." Hermione greeted as both boys sat down next to her

"Hey 'mione. Ready for double Potions today?" Harry asked as he piled several pancakes on to a plate.

"Of course. I read the chapter last night. Hopefully Ron did as well." Hermione looked to Ron who was turning pink around the fork sticking out of his mouth.

"Ronald! Its Monday, which means it independent brewing, how can you expect to brew a proper potion by yourself if you don't read the chapter?!" Hermione asked him trying to keep her voice down, for which, both boys were thankful.

"I was gonna read it 'mione, really. I just…forgot. I'll read it before class, no worries." Ron stuffed a sausage into his mouth as Hermione sighed.

"Honestly Ron, Harry's been applying himself in class and has earned high marks. You could do the same if you just studied, don't you think, Harry?" Harry looked back and forth between them as he poured syrup on his plate.

"Oh, no! Keep me outta this."

"You know I'm right."

"Yea, but I also know that Ron won't be studying like we do. Just give it up Hermione. But if you promise to pay attention and take notes- I'll help you with the Wolfsbane Potion we're expected to brew today." Harry looked at Ron as he smiled and didn't notice Snape walk pass him then pause to look at them.

"Thank you for the advance warning, Mr. Potter. I will make the necessary preparations for the catastrophe that will inevitably occur in my classroom today." Harry's eyes followed Snape as he walked towards the head table, as Draco laughed from behind Ron.

"Seriously, can't Snape just accept that a Gryffindor is good at Potions? I mean the three of us haven't even caused an explosion yet this year. That's gotta be some sort of record."

"Don't worry about it on. He'll change his mind after today. I can produce a flawless Wolfsbane Potion with my eyes closed. I've been making it for Lupin for over two years now.

The Potions class began as Snape walked into a silencing classroom with his robes billowing behind him.

"Hopefully you have all done your reading. Who can tell me what the Wolfsbane Potion is used for?" Hermione raised her hand as she sat up straighter in her chair.

"Anyone besides Ms. Granger?" Snape asked as he reached the front of the classroom. He raised his wand as instructions for brewing appeared on the board.

"Mr. Potter, would you please enlighten us as to what the potion is brewed for." Harry looked startled but answered

"The Wolfsbane potion is brewed to prevent the transformation into full werewolf form during the full moon."

"Correct. And what is the proper color of the potion when brewed correctly?"

"Dark emerald with slight specs of gray on the topmost surface."

"Correct again, Mr. Potter. Astonishing the things that happen when one finally applies themselves. I am thrilled to see that you've learned that there is more to you than your unearned fame."

The Slytherins began snickering as Hermione nearly growled. Harry lowered his face to hide his growing blush; he realized that he was the only one in class that realized that there was a compliment hidden within those scathing words.

Class had been running smoothly as Harry carefully brewed his potion. Snape went from cauldron to cauldron surveying the results.

"Impressive, Mr. Malfoy. 20 points to Slytherin."

Severus walked towards Harry's side of the room as Harry looked and noticed Ron about to add the new ingredient

"Ron, NO!"


	3. Questions

Ron! NO!

Harry threw up a protective barrier around the cauldron as the other students watched the contents explode but stay contained within the shield. Harry kept his wand pointed at the aura surrounding the cauldron as he looked at Ron with anger, eyes only softening when he saw his friend stare at the floor embarrassed. He looked around the room and saw that everyone was safe and dropped his wand as his shield dissipated. He sighed in relief as Professor Snape yelled to the class

"Mr. Weasley, stay behind! Mr. Potter, I will talk to you in your detention tonight. Class dismissed.

Harry knocked on the door of Snape's, classroom pushing the door open after hearing a bellow permitting him entry.

"Mr. Potter, I see that you managed to be on time. Have a seat." Snape said gesturing towards the chair in front of his desk.

"Thank you" Harry spoke clearly through his nervousness; he knew how Snape hated when people mumbled. Harry sat and tried his hardest to look relaxed, after all this wasn't really a detention.

"Would you care to explain what happened in class today, Mr. Potter?" Snape leaned back in his chair.

"Well, sir, Ron added crushed ginger to the mixture instead of the cloved garlic that the potion called for. An easy mistake, I suppose, since the ingredients are next to each other in the ingredients cabinet. The ginger reacted poorly with the unstable potion and resulted in a violent explosion." Harry answered hoping that his explanation proved satisfactory.

"That is not what I meant, Mr. Potter." Harry inwardly cringed, apparently his answer did not sound as he wished it to. "The Shield Charm. Did you really believe that I would not notice?"

"I don't understand, sir." Harry said, trying to hide the brow that ruffled in confusion, despite his attempt to keep it at bay.

Snape sat foreword in his chair, resting his hands on the desk while touching the tips of his fingers together. "Did you know, Mr. Potter, that Shield Charms are not brought into your school curriculum until later this year?"

"Yes, Sir, I've already read the entire text book." Harry replied

"So then, you are aware how difficult it is to produce a Shield Charm?" Snape inquired

"Yes, Sir." Harry didn't find it particularly difficult, but he didn't want to upset the potions master by saying such.

"Did you know that it is almost impossible for a protection spell to be used if the spell caster is not inside of the spell's area?"

"I didn't, Sir." Harry didn't have to hide his worry or surprise at this point, it came so naturally.

"There are only three spells known to the Wizarding World that can protect something without requiring the caster to be in the spell field. The spell you used was not any one of those three. Where did you find the spell you used Mr. Potter?" Snape leaned closer waiting for the answer that seemed slow in coming. Surely Harry realized the danger in using such a unique spell.

"I made it, Sir." Harry looked at his feet

"Do you expect me to believe that, Mr. Potter?" Severus asked with his best sneer evident on his face.

"No, but it's the truth, Sir."

Snape was ready to snap back with a retort and possibly deduct points, but though better of it. Clearly Mr. Potter was not the same man he was last year, the usually unforgiving professor was compelled to give the young man in front of him a second chance. Had he ever really given him a first? Snape was so sure that Harry was just like his arrogant bully of a father, he had judged him before he even set foot in the castle. He stopped the thought process before it could go any further, and looked to the nervous young man in front of him.

"I believe you, Potter" Snape replied folding his arms in front of his chest.

"You believe me? Just like that?" Harry's surprise was clearly evident in his voice and the professor in front of him was stifling a laugh.

"Several things have been brought to my attention as of late that may have slightly altered my views about you. But you must realize that you are in a class of Slytherins, where The Dark Lord has eyes. You must be more careful about such things from now on. I will have to inform Albus of what has occurred today, though he has most likely already heard." Severus Said making to stand when he was interrupted by a voice

"May I ask you a question, Sir?" Harry mustered up all the Gryffindor courage h could manage and dove feet first into uncharted territory.

"You may." Severus replied raising an eyebrow

"Why have you been following me?" Harry all but blurted out, readying to be yelled at and thrown out.

"Very astute of you to notice, Mr. Potter, most students would not have. It was actually concerning your summer essay." Snape leaned over and pulled a long parchment from the corner of his desk.

"My essay, Professor? I don't understand. I felt that I had done a rather excellent job." Harry said baffled

"And that was the problem. Mr. Potter, last year your essays were abysmal at best. This essay, however, puts even Ms. Granger's to shame. With such a sudden change, well, it would only be normal to have suspicions about the originality of your work."

"By suspicions you mean-" Harry began stumbling over the sentence.

"Cheating, mostly of the plagiarism variety. The suspicions, however, have all but been extinguished." Severus began to stand. "Let's continue to talk over potions. I'm going to ask you to make the Wolfsbane that you failed to complete in class. Does that sound fair?"

"Yes, Sir." Harry nodded, simply happy that he had been given another chance.

"Very well. Gather the ingredients from the cupboard in the second door on the left and begin. Don't mess it up, you are using my private stock. I heard from the Headmaster that you have been brewing the potion for that flea bitten wolf of yours. As much as it pains me to admit, I would rather you use the higher quality ingredients so that the potion is more effective. I have to pay a visit to the old fool upstairs; I will be back in a bit. I expect a catastrophe free room upon my return. Oh, and I want your glamour removed by the time I have returned as well." Snape said as he grabbed a handful of floo powder and sent himself to the Headmaster's office.

Harry was, to say the least, flabbergasted. Snape had given him a second chance, he was helping Remus with his transformation process, and he was helping him with potions. Harry began to wonder if he hadn't fallen on his head during class, and that this was all just a dream. He pulled the ingredients from the private storage room as the cauldron heated. He took in only a few seconds to marvel at the expansive and impressive collection that his professor possessed. His mind wandering to the fact that, upon Snape's return, he would have to ask the man about what he had seen last night. He couldn't risk not knowing what about his secrecy had been exposed, though he had a good guess. As he carried the potion ingredients to the table he would keep calm the best way he knew how. Harry flicked his wand as instrumental music began to play in the room. Harry began adding potions and stirring as he sang.

"_**Seems like our love is on a road to nowhere fast  
All my life I thought a love like this would last  
But every road can hide a corner we can`t see  
I had a vision that I woke up by your side  
I felt you breathing and our souls were intertwined  
But who controls love`s destiny? Not me.**_

_**We had it all right in our hands,  
We had the space to fly and still a place to land" **_

Harry followed the rhythm with his every movement and corked a potion setting it on the table near him. He shed his outer cloak off and flung it into the air and sharply flicked his wand as the cloak flew across the room and hung itself on the coat hook hanging from the wall. He continued singing, moving his hands with the music, emphasizing his words. He never noticed or heard the fireplace signal with the arrival of the Potions Master.

_**So I`m calling out, I`m calling out to the only one  
Who can save us from what we`ve done  
Don`t leave me hanging on  
I`m reaching out and praying you`ll come back again  
It`s just darkness I`m living in  
And you`re the only place my heart has ever been.  
**_

Severus thanked Merlin for small miracles. Harry hadn't noticed him return, which he was thankful for since he could do nothing but stand in awe at the man in front of him. His voice penetrated the air like a knife, demanding to be noticed, but seemed to caress every surface it touched, like velvet. His voice was singing deeper than it had been last night, he could fill it bursting with emotion. He looked on in silence noticing the man's waist-length, silky, black hair move through the air as he moved to the music, his shoulders wide with the confidence that his voice seemed to give him. He was taller, nearly as tall as the potions master himself, he was thin, but he knew that years of toned muscles from playing Quidditch, lay hidden beneath the surface. Harry stirred the pot a few times before removing the sweater vest that the uniforms required; Severus noticed his breath hitch when a sliver of the man's lower back could be seen, peeking out just above the waist on his trousers. Harry straitened the white dress shirt beneath his hands as he rolled up the sleeves revealing a tattoo of a snake wrapping around his wrist, seeming to slither against that smooth tan skin. Severus noted that the man's hands seemed longer, more adult and much less clumsy looking than they had been before. Severus wondered if it was perhaps the elegant gold and emerald ring he was wearing, but he didn't believe it was. He noticed the strong jaw line as the man before him sang. His throat moving beautifully against the still air in the room, moving up and down, forming around the exquisite words the man bellowed. He noticed how he seemed stronger, more powerful, both magnificent and deadly at the same time. Snape saw Harry's face as he hid from the man, he had grown out of the awkward proportions he once had, nothing from his face stood out as awkward. Severus was reminded of a grand tapestry, the strings woven together to create, something on a whole, absolutely flawless and beautiful. That's all that he could think of this new man in front of him as, flawless and beautiful.

_  
__**Maybe I`m young and in the ways of love naive  
Maybe I`m desperate for a reason to believe  
There wasn`t any way I thought that we would fall.  
I`ve seen perfection in a rainbow in the sky  
I`ve seen a child make the coldest grown man cry  
But loving you I thought was greater than them all.**_

_**We had it all, just you and me  
Now there`s a doorway to my heart without a key**_

_**So I`m calling out, I`m calling out to the only one  
Who can save us from what we`ve done  
Don`t leave me hanging on  
I`m reaching out and praying you`ll come back again  
It`s just darkness I`m living in  
And you`re the only place my heart has ever been.**_

_**Wherever you are right now  
Come back and show me how you feel  
Because I`m lost without you here**_

_**Calling out, I`m calling out to the only one  
Who can save us from what we`ve done  
Don`t leave me hanging on  
And I`m reaching out and praying you`ll come back again  
It`s just darkness I`m living in  
Cause you`re the only place my heart has ever been.**_

Harry finished singing and stood stirring his potion as the sound of clapping from behind made him jump. Looking at his professor, he noticed that the clapping was genuine, not mocking as it had once been.

"You've clearly been trained in the art of singing, Mr. Potter." Snape stood foreword approaching Harry's cauldron as he noticed just how sharp the man's facial features had become. But out of all that has changed; his slim neck, his tamed raven locks and even his height, it was his shining emerald eyes that stayed the same, for which Snape was grateful. Snape had trouble remembering when the simple act of looking at someone could take his breath away. He found himself strangely drawn to the man in front of him, drawn to study his every feature, drawn to know who he really was, and drawn to touch every inch.

"I may have taken a few lessons." Harry replied blush rushing to his cheeks as Severus bent down to study the progress of the potion. "How long were you there?" Harry dared to ask.

"Not overly long, I assure you. This potion is coming along remarkably well." Severus looked at the man in front of him sensing nervousness for a reason that Snape could not find.

"Yes, well, I have had a lot of practice, and it is much easier with the higher quality ingredients you allowed me to use." Harry added a few drops of a purple liquid and stirred a few times. "May I ask how much you watched me, or rather, how much you witnessed of last night?"

Severus was taken aback at how direct the question had been, but supposed it was better than skirting around the issue.

"Indeed. I watched you during Quidditch and hoped to catch you on your way back to the castle. I was hoping I could get you to confess to cheating, however, when I didn't see you I headed to the Captain's Office. I saw that the lights were off and I was about to head back towards the castle when I saw and heard someone in the showers whom I did not recognize as a student. I only saw his back so I could not be sure, but I waited outside behind a tree to question the stranger until I saw the text books and robes. I had to keep an eye on the person to make sure that they were not simply a Death Eater in disguise. You can imagine my surprise when I found out that it was you."

Harry was silent as he proceeded to chop a root for the potion. Severus could almost feel the uneasiness coming from the man in front of him.

"I suppose you already know the question I'm going to ask?" Snape saw the man tense and witnessed his back straighten in defiance.

"I can think of several though I can't say I'm thrilled to answer them."

"I will make a deal with you. For every question that is answered to my satisfaction, I will instruct a potion of your choice to brew. You will have my office, my ingredients, and my assistance."

Harry was dumbfounded. Snape was giving him private lessons for simply answering his questions? He would be able to master Varitaserum before the class approached!

"Agreed." Harry said as he handed Snape the ladle to continue stirring as he grabbed a potion from behind him.

* * *

I'm SOOO sorry for not having posted in so long. Life has been crazy lately. I made the chapter twice as long as the last one as my way of appologizing, and I'm nearly done with chapter 4, so you wont have to wait long for that. I've also been working on a few other stories that should be up in a bit, so keep an eye out for those. Thank you for reading! Reviews are ALWAYS welcome. Thanks again.

Oh, and the song is not my own of course- It is Josh Groban's "You're The Only Place". I'm on a Josh Groban kick right now. heehee


	4. You May Call Me Severus

"Alright, Potter, why in the name of Merlin, would you be wearing a glamour?" Severus asked

"In the middle of my third year, Dumbledore noticed the physical changes that I was going through and told me that there was a strong glamour he created long ago that would take the physical appearance of the person casting it and the glamour would age and change little by little at a normal aging rate until it reached the end result pictured by the caster. He told me the story of how it was created and gave me the option to take on the glamour. He told me that I could time the end image it would morph into with the time of my graduation. At first, I wondered why he was telling me all of this, giving me such a silly option. He told me that after I defeated Voldemort, he imagined that I would like to live a quiet life. He said that with everyone looking for the _image_ that they cherished all these years, they would not think to look for the _person_. I would be able to be free after the war, no constant reporters, no blasphemous stories, or unauthorized photos, no one knowing where I was unless I wanted them to. That's something I've never had. Freedom. Dumbledore gave me a week to decide and of course I took him up on the offer. It seemed too good not to." Harry paused to stir the cauldron as he dropped in some more ingredients.

"You regret the decision? Why?" Snape asked, hoping to edge the younger man into telling the rest of the story.

"It's complicated. The offer was tempting, to be free after the war. But much later on I realized that it was only part of the reason I went through with it, and by then it was too late, I had go through enough changes that my glamour differed greatly from my real form. Part of the reason I went through with it was because I knew that I'm not a savior. I'm not pure or sinless as the rest of the world believes. I thought that if I could keep the appearance of the modest, innocent savior…well, than maybe I could become that. Little do people know that the savior that they see, the innocent boy who they believe will rescue them from fear and confinement, is stuck in his own cage, with a lock that he put on and lost they key to. People will not accept me for whom I've become. I'm not pure enough, not innocent enough, not sinless. And my appearance now, they would either shun me, or accuse me of being a dark wizard. My looks have not exactly kept the light, gentle, air they once had."

"No, I suppose they have not, but do not fool yourself into thinking you are not beautiful." Severus mentally cringed. "I for one am glad to have relief from looking at a mini replica of your father." Snape sneered hoping that the man in front of him missed his slip-up. "Take comfort in the fact that once you are done with defeating The Dark Lord, you can have your freedom. You can marry Ms. Weasley, or play professional Quidditch, or whatever it is you wish to do after you graduate." Severus felt some sort of pain in his chest. After realizing it was sorrow at the last thing he said, he began to wonder about his sanity. Harry however burst out into laughter.

"What, may I ask, is so funny?" Severus looked at Harry with anger, though his mind held none of the feelings he displayed.

"Sorry," Harry wiped away his tears. "You'll be happy to know that I've decided to pursue a serious vocation, not just a useless career in sports. It's just funny, is all. That's why I'm putting all my effort to succeed for the rest of my duration at this school."

"What ever you decide, I'm sure Ms. Weasley will-" Severus glared at the man in front of him "And why are you laughing again?!"

"Clearly you need to know the person, not the image. Ginny and I are just friends."

"Well, I'm sure any woman would welcome you with open arms." Harry tried to stifle his giggles and the depression at how hopeless his love life was, silenced any other laughter that may have been wanting to escape.

"I'm not- there won't be any woman. Surely you remember my conversation with Hermione and Ron?"

"I thought that I may have…misheard a few aspects." Severus asked shocked

"You didn't, I'm gay. I have been for quite some time now. As I said earlier, freedom is something I've never had. If anyone found out- it would be all over the papers by morning. I cherish what little privacy I am able to maintain in this world. So, I just sit in my cage and wish for the only person I've ever truly been in love with, to come and set me free." Harry silenced as he peeled a root to dice in the potion

"Do you think they will?" Severus inquired, though why he felt sadness and jealousy mix together in his heart he could not fathom.

Harry hung his head low. "There have been little glimmers of hope, but no. No, he would never allow himself to feel the same." Harry felt a wave of sadness wash over his soul, and he thought that maybe Severus sensed it, because he put a hand on his shoulder

"Harry, I'm no stranger to Homosexuality, being a member of that club myself. Should you ever wish to talk…"

Harry smiled softly "Thank you."

Severus broke the awkward silence with another question. "So, you have decided to pursue an admirable vocation, which means you are dedicated. I, however, wonder why you have deemed it acceptable to allow yourself to be dismal up to this point." Snape tried to keep the anger out of his voice, but it was difficult. "If the essay you wrote for me is any true indication of your ability, you could have easily surpassed Ms. Granger and been in advanced classes at this point. Did you simply feel it was too much of a bother to try to succeed?" Snape hated when students did not give their full effort, especially when they were so obviously gifted with intelligence.

"I hate the fame that surrounds me, Professor. It's crushing, suffocating. I have never wanted anything more than to have a normal childhood, to be like everyone else. Fate however, has not been kind enough to grant me that. By doing no more than was absolutely necessary, I could hide with the rest of the students. I studied, believe it or not, but if I were to excel in school…well, that was just another way I would stand out. I realized at the end of last year that if I wanted a normal, respectable job in the Wizarding World, then I would have to earn it. I suppose people would hire me based on my fame, but that would be detestable to me. I want to earn my place like everyone else has done."

"I suppose that I can understand not wanting to stand out. Wanting to earn a vocation instead of having it handed to you on a silver platter is both respectable and admirable, Mr. Potter." Snape said with a gentle voice, trying to demonstrate his understanding.

"Would it be acceptable to request for you to call me Harry?" Harry asked

"I suppose that would be acceptable for these sessions. Does it really make a difference?" Snape wondered.

"To me, yes. Mr. Potter is the boy with the scar, the mask I wear; Harry is who I really am, deep inside. Does that make sense?"

"It does. Now, if I may venture to ask, why do you speak so much about wanting to be normal? It is not all that its cracked up to be. Was being treated like a king a home not enough for you?" Snape immediately regretted his words when he saw the man in front of him tense then drop his shoulders with a resigned sadness. "I'm sorry, that was uncalled for. It's going to take a bit of time to fully realize that you were not the boy-king I always thought you to be."

"No, it's alright. I wish for a normal childhood because I never had one. My parents are dead and I lived with my aunt and uncle. Not exactly normal. They hate the Wizarding World, you know. When I was younger, my uncle tried to beat the magic out of me. They treated me very similar to how Malfoy Sr. treats his house elves actually." Snape cringed at his words knowing exactly how Lucius treated them. "When I became old enough I started taking classes at the community college near their home during the summer. I would take enough classes to occupy most of the day." Harry scoffed. "I told them that I just wanted a quiet muggle life when I was done with Hogwarts, and that if I could gain a scholarship, my uncle wouldn't have to pay for anything. The fools believed me, and granted me permission to attend classes. With schooling and doing the same amount of chores after I got home, my uncle found less time to beat me. I excelled, of course, taking every class I could get into. I have never earned less than a 'B' at the college. I actually have enough credits to get a degree. Over the summer, Hermione helped me to map out a study schedule for this school year, which has proven rather beneficial. I'm excelling at Hogwarts for the first time and I'm finally earning my place in this world. So, to answer you're question, no, I have never had a normal childhood."

"Surely the head master would change your living arrangements if you let him know how the muggles treated you!" Severus felt sorry for the man in front of him, realizing just how similar they really were.

"I have discussed it with the Headmaster. Needless to say, he was enraged to find out. He told me that I was welcome to stay at Hogwarts during the summer and the holidays. But I knew the importance of the blood wards at my Uncle's house, so I told Albus that I would return to their house for the summer. He objected of course and made conditions to which I had to meet; writing every three days, sending Hedwig if I needed help, staying at the school during he holiday breaks, you know how Albus is." Harry smiled at the thought of how caring the great wizard was, how he was like a grandfather to him.

"I see. So, has he allowed you to call him by his first name?"

"Oh, sorry. Yes, he has. We are on a first name basis as you can imagine. He helps train me during the holiday breaks." Harry laughed thinking of his last lesson with the older man.

"I see. Alright, next question…."

Harry looked up at his professor wondering if the man knew how beautiful he looked, how desirable he was with his long sleek hair and pale skin. He wondered if he knew how the man constantly amazed Harry with his love of potions and his seemingly unending knowledge of everything. Harry wished that there was some alternate universe where Snape would fight the Dark Lord side by side with him. Harry became lost in thought.

"Harry? Are you alright?"

"Hmm? Oh, yes. Sorry, just lost in thought." Harry said forcing a smile to his face

"As I was saying, who else besides the Headmaster and your two school mates knows?"

"Remus, Neville, Luna Lovegood, and yourself. I only told those I knew would keep my secret. Those are the few people who know me for who I really am."

"Then it seems that I have much to learn." Severus said as he marveled at how little he really knew Harry.

"Indeed. I believe the potion is done." Harry said looking at the contents of his cauldron.

"And why do you believe that, Harry?"

"Because it has just turned to the proper shade of emerald. Am I incorrect?" Harry asked nervously hoping he was right, hoping that he had not been brewing the potion for Remus wrong this entire time.

"No, you are correct. I simply wanted to test your knowledge. You passed with flying colors of course." Severus said, his heart melting at the smile that shone on Harry's face. "Bottle it up and we will give it to that mangy wolf of yours." Severus handed Harry the large vial as their fingers brushed against each other, the older man felt a tingle, a nervous sensation, soon replaced by a warm feeling taking over his every sense.

"Very good job, Harry." Snape quickly recovered and looked at the potion.

"Thank you, Professor Snape." Harry said as he gathered the ingredients and flicked a wand which sent them flying back to their original spots on the shelves.

"Severus." Snape said plainly

"I'm sorry?" Harry asked

"You may all me Severus." Snape said as the young man looked at him with a smile. "But only in our private sessions. You are to address me normally elsewhere."

"Of course, Severus." Harry said. "May I ask you a question?" Snape nodded "I have been making the Wolfsbane for quite some time and I know that peppermint oil helps with pain in many potions, I also know that it will counteract the Monkshood. But recently there was a derivative of peppermint oil found in Nepal, deep in the Himalayan Mountains, it is said to have the same properties, but differs molecularly. If it were added to the Wolfsbane potion to help ease the pain, would it have the same negative reaction with the Monkshood?"

"I will look into it. Now, it is nearing curfew. You should be getting back to your dormitory, and don't let me catch you wandering around." Severus marveled at the man walking out of the room. That finding was exclusive to Potion Makers Monthly; clearly Harry was more than he appeared, much more. Especially since the magazine only briefly mentioned using it in pain potions, not at all in the Wolfsbane potion. Severus himself had not even thought of that possibility! Harry was a wonder, Severus decided as he ended the night in front of the fire with a glass of Firewhiskey.


	5. Revelatons and Loss of Control

The next day Harry sat at breakfast with his glamour in place as he noticed the mail coming in. Hedwig dropped a few letters in his lap along with something that Snape recognized to be a potions magazine, he laughed to himself as Harry quickly shoved it in his school bag. He opened a letter from Remus asking how he was doing; Remus told him that he would be substitute teaching for a week as the DADA teacher. Harry showed the letter to Ron, Hermione, and Neville who all smiled in turn. Harry was on cloud nine and didn't even notice a large black bird swoop to his table just a few moments before. Harry was rereading Remus' letter as the bird pecked his hand.

"And who do you belong to beautiful?" Harry asked stroking the birds back between its wings. The bird hopped onto one of Harry's hands as he used his other hand to untie the note from his leg. The bird then hopped to Harry's shoulder as he read over the letter

"Potter,

You will come to my chambers after your last class. I believe that the potion is of your choosing.

Professor Severus Snape"

Snape looked at Potter in awe as his Raven stayed perched on the boy's shoulder. Severus believed that his bird must have lost it; his bird hated everyone, including Snape! He stared at Annabelle Lee as she nuzzled the boy's cheek, hearing Dumbledore chuckle several seats down.

Harry giggled as the black bird nuzzled his cheek and nipped at his ear, he grabbed a glass and filled it with cold water and held it up to the bird as he took several drinks before nipping at his ear. Harry's friends stared at him in amazement as he played with the black bird. Harry reached into his back and pulled out a bird treat.

"I don't believe that your owner will mind." Harry said as he held the treat to the bird, which in turn just tilted its head. "Go, on, take it" Harry said as he gave the treat to the bird who took it and flew off.

"What a sweet bird…" Harry said absentmindedly

"Okay…" Ron spoke "Now that Harry's gone blimey, are we ready for Transfiguration?"

* * *

The day went by slowly, in Harry's opinion, but he took a deep breath as he knocked on his professor's door.

"Evening, Potter, come in." Snape spoke as the door closed; he put up a silencing charm. "You may remove your glamour." Harry flicked his wand as the glamour faded away. Severus' breath caught in his throat as Harry hung his cloak on the hook near the door.

"Good evening, Severus." Harry said as he nodded to the older man in front of him.

"Harry." Severus said as he returned the nod

"I was hoping that we could brew Veritaserum today."

"I believe that it my be a bit complicated for you, but if that is what you wish." Severus said as he as greeted with a smile from Harry. "Gather the ingredients from my private store room."

Harry watched a Severus grabbed a cauldron from across the room, noticing that the man's trousers were tight against his ass as he bent to retrieve something. Harry mentally reprimanded himself as he went to the storage cabinet, grabbing most of the ingredients for the potion that he needed. He took them back and set them on the table.

"Harry, perhaps you have forgotten an ingredient?" Severus suggested as Harry bent down to retrieve something from his bag.

"Not at all professor. I had a feeling that you would ask me to use your personal potions ingredients, so I brought my own Dragon Blood and Lionfish Spines, that way if I do mess it up, it won't cost you an arm and a leg to replace." Severus looked stunned at the young man in front of him. "Is…is that alright professor?" Severus laughed

"Yes, that will be just fine, Harry." Severus turned to retrieve a cutting board for the man. "Now, the potions text book complicates the third step by stating that you need to crush the Lionfish spines immediately before adding them to the potion, when in fact, you can do it up to an hour ahead of time. The text also fails to mention that you will need to drain the poison out of the spines before you crush them, if you fail to do this, the potion will make the person vomit the potion up before the effects can sink in. I will watch you perform the first four steps tonight, then next week, when it is done steeping, I will help you with the addition of the Dragon's Blood."

"That sounds great. Um, since the first four steps will only take half an hour can we work on an advance version of a Boil-relief potion?"

"We can, but why that specific potion? It is a rather easy one."

"Neville had an accident in Herbology today, and I prefer not to brew my potions with Moaning Myrtle watching over me. He's to embarrassed to ask Madam Pomfrey for help and I told him that I would brew it for him."

"I believe that can be arranged, it shouldn't take more than an hour. I can even teach you how to improve it so he only has to take two doses, instead of the usual four." Severus said as he watched Harry pull the Lionfish Spines from the case. He watched as he drained the poison into a vial. Harry finished and began to snap them into smaller pieces before putting them into the mortar and pestle. Harry looked up, smiling, after Severus spoke.

"Thank you, that means a lot to me." Harry said

"Yes, but I imagine that it means even more to Mr. Longbottom." Severus said before both men burst into laughter.

"I'd imagine so." Harry said after several minutes. Harry put the pestle down and rolled up his sleeves as he began making the potion, only minutes later adding the Lionfish spines.

"Great," Severus said "now let it simmer for fifteen minutes while we begin out next potion." Severus grabbed another cauldron as Harry turned the heat down. His eyes watched the man snap, to find that all of his potions ingredients were flying back to the cupboard from the exact spot that they came from.

"How long have you been able to do wandless magic, Harry?" Severus asked striking up conversation.

Harry began setting a low fire for the Boil-cure potion, "Well, I began teaching it to myself during 3rd year, but I wasn't able to get any real results until 4th year. After that it just came as a second nature. I find mind-only to be far more difficult, but it is coming along as well as could be expected I suppose."

"You are a sixth year! You are not even expected to do simple wandless spell until later this year, and yet you are telling me that you have accomplished wandless magic, and are practicing mind-less?!"

"Well, yes and no. I can only do about two thirds of all the spells I know as wandless, so I can't say that I've accomplished it. But as far as mind-only, I can only to the more basic defensive and offensive spells." Harry said as he kept adding ingredients to the pot.

"Two thirds of your spell knowledge is more than most certified wizards can do wandless, I think you may be tied only with Albus in that regard." Severus looked at the man in front of him in awe of the power he had, which he apparently didn't even know was amazing. "I'm only slightly more surprised at your mind-only magic ability. Now even Albus can do offensive mind-only magic, he can only do defensive. And if Ms. Granger's outburst the other night was any indication, you have far more powers than you're letting on, Harry."

"Yes, well, Hermione is just easily impressed by my simple charms creations. She thinks I should write a few books and publish them."

"Why don't you?" Severus asked.

"I hardly have time to focus on a book. My sole focus is on my studies and defeating Vol-The Dark Lord. Besides, I don't believe that it would be a terribly great idea to let You-Know-Who know that my powers have grown exponentially. Last thing I need is another offer to join-" Harry realized what he had said and changed topics "So, no, I just don't have time to publish a book. Besides most of my charms become flawed when anyone else tries to use the more complicated ones. I tried to teach Ron how to jinx Malfoy's hair, and he ended up setting his own on fire." Harry laughed at the memory, the looked over noticing how serious Severus looked. Harry sighed "Go ahead and ask…I knew that hoping you had noticed my slip up was just wishful thinking."

"You were given an offer to join the Dark Lord?!" Severus growled

"Yes, last year at the Ministry. When he entered my mind, he got a slight glimpse of how much my power had grown, before I could block him." Harry's shoulders slumped as he continued to talk. "After taunting me, he offered me a position by his side, as his equal." Harry laughed; it would have sounded hollow if it were not filled with so much disgust. "That piece of garbage. 'we can do great things together' he said. I knew he was lying, of course. He would never allow anyone to have as much power as he has, but it was tempting."

Severus was shocked, to say the least. "Power that great would be temping to anyone, Harry" Severus said trying to console the man.

"It wasn't the power, or the status. It was something else entirely. I told Albus and Remus, once we got back to the safety of the Headmaster's office, of course. They were somewhere between disbelief and blinding anger. I don't think it was at me however, but Albus helped teach me more advance offensive spells after that." Harry diced peppermint root for the potion hoping that the question had been answered enough for Snape.

"If you hate the Dark Lord so much, and if it wasn't for power, then why would you consider joining him?" Severus asked pulling his chair closer to Harry's. Harry stiffened at the question as his face paled.

"He told me that he could bring back…Sirius…from inside the veil." Harry's voice broke "I remembered something before I was able to push him out of my mind completely. 'Death is the next great adventure', that's what Albus told me once." Severus noticed a tear fall down Harry's face as he pulled the man close to him.

"That's why you were so broken up after the incident at the ministry. It was not so much the fact that he died, but that you could not bring yourself to bring him back?" He felt Harry nod in his shoulder. "Harry, there is no bringing someone back after they have fallen through the veil. If there was, I would help you find it." Severus said as he looked into the man's dark eyes.

"Thank you." Harry said with a smile.

"That's more like it; now let's talk about something a bit happier, hmmm?"

Harry chuckled and wiped the tears from his eyes.

"So, you subscribe to Potion Makers Monthly and Weekly Brewers, do you?" Severus asked with an arched eyebrow as Harry blushed then laughed.

"Perhaps. You have a friendly Raven?"

"I assure you that you are the first person she has ever been friendly with. How did you know that she was a raven? Most people confuse her with a crow."

"Crows are not that intelligent. So she isn't that friendly normally?" Harry asked adding ingredients to the cauldron.

"Let me put it this way, if I do not keep Annabelle Lee in her cage, she sits on top of my head and pecks me to death." Severus said jokingly, to which Harry bent over laughing, barely managing to keep stirring the cauldron. After a few minutes Severus spoke up.

"Would you kindly stop laughing now?" Severus put on a scowl, but he was rather amused at seeing Harry laugh like that. Severus felt a warmth in his chest at the sight of Harry's long hair begin to fall in his face

"I can't. The image is just too humorous." Snape rolled his eyes, knowing that the image the man was imagining must have been funny to cause such a reaction. Snape took some of the vials back to the cupboard, hiding the smirk on his face; he took several moments to sort them back into their original spots. He looked at Harry, realizing that he must have been stirring in the last ingredient at this point and,

"Oh, Harry," Severus rushed from the closet "don't forget, 20 clockwise stirs and 22 counter clockwise." Severus said as he noticed Harry put the last ingredient back on the table. Harry looked lost in his own world, so Severus stood behind him counting his stirs. He noticed that Harry was about to make a 21st clockwise stir which would partially negate some of the stronger ingredient properties. Severus rolled his eyes as he put his hands on the large oar-like spoon that Harry was stirring with. He felt a heat rise in his stomach as he realized that his hands were on top of Harry's. The young man was brought out of his daze as he realized that Severus' hands were on top of his, stirring the potion. Harry slowly moved his head and dared to look up as he noticed his professor's dark eyes staring back down at him. Their faces moved closer together.

"Severus…" Harry all but whispered before the older man brought their lips crushing together. Harry cast a mind-only stirring spell as the men brought their hands to tangle in each other's hair, silently begging to be closer.

*YAY! I'm sorry for the cliff hanger. I hate them too. But it was either that or wait several more days until I'm nearly done with chap 6. In the next chapter, Remus will be returning! (And If you review, i may have him walk in on a nice juicy scene between Sev and Harry. *wink*)


	6. Dinner on Saturday?

"_Oh, Harry," Severus rushed from the closet "don't forget, 20 clockwise stirs and 22 counter clockwise." Severus said as he noticed Harry put the last ingredient back on the table. Harry looked lost in his own world, so Severus stood behind him counting his stirs. He noticed that Harry was about to make a 21__st__ clockwise stir which would partially negate some of the stronger ingredient properties. Severus rolled his eyes as he put his hands on the large oar-like spoon that Harry was stirring with. He felt a heat rise in his stomach as he realized that his hands were on top of Harry's. The young man was brought out of his daze as he realized that Severus' hands were on top of his, stirring the potion. Harry slowly moved his head and dared to look up as he noticed his professor's dark eyes staring back down at him. Their faces moved closer together._

"_Severus…" Harry all but whispered before the older man brought their lips crushing together. Harry cast a mind-only stirring spell as the men brought their hands to tangle in each other's hair, silently begging to be closer._

After several moments the men broke apart. Harry's eyes fluttered open displaying the bliss he'd felt at kissing the older man. Severus looked at the man in front of him and realized what he'd done.

"Merlin, Harry I'm so sorry! I don't know what came over me." Severus said trying to gather his thoughts. What was he thinking? This man as his student, yes he was an adult by society standards, but Severus still taught him. "Perhaps it would be best if you left." Severus said as he backed away.

"No." Harry said standing up.

"Excuse me?" Severus said

"I mean, can't we just talk about it?"

"What is there to talk about? I took advantage of you." Harry looked at Severus stunned, the older man was furious. "Do you want an apology? Is that it? Then you have it, I'm sorry." Severus said as he made his way to his personal chambers.

"Stop!" Harry shouted before Severus left him. "Is that really what you think, that you took advantage of me? Maybe you don't remember but I was kissing you back! I don't want an apology; I want you to evaluate your feelings. If you think that you can be in a relationship with me, then why not try?"

Severus was shocked "You have no idea what you are saying, you're young, and you don't know what you want."

"I know exactly what I'm saying and I know exactly what I want; I want you. I have wanted you for the last two and a half years."

"Harry, no. I'm old enough to be your father, I'm a spy for The Order, and I'm your teacher."

"Do you think I honestly care about any of that? Severus, I came to terms with my feelings about you a long time ago, and nothing you say can dissuade me. Nothing. You obviously have some feelings towards me, even if you don't know what they are completely, can't we explore those? Please, don't shut me out. Don't run away."

"Harry…" Severus spoke. What would he say? "Perhaps you are right, I'd like to be with you, but I can't rush into things. Neither can you. Let's think things over for a bit and then we can talk about them. Just give me a day or two." Severus said as he put his hand on the man's cheek.

"Thursday, then?" Harry asked as the older man nodded.

"Thursday, after dinner. I believe that the potion is your choosing again." Severus said as he smirked. "Now, it is nearing curfew and I believe that you have a potion to give to Mr. Longbottom." Severus was rewarded with the brightest smile he had ever seen on Harry's face.

"I suppose that's fair. I'll see you Thursday, Severus." Harry said as he called all the items he needed to his school bag which was flying across the room to land by his feet. Harry leaned forward and placed a chaste kiss on the older man's cheek. Severus watched Harry walk out the portrait.

The man poured himself a glass of Firewhiskey from his cabinet. Severus sat in thought, he was older, but Harry obviously didn't care about that. Harry apparently didn't care bout any of that, he said that he had come to terms with that a long time ago and-wait…a long time ago… Severus remembered a conversation from several nights before.

"_You could have any girl in the castle with your looks!" Hermione exclaimed_

"_You know I'm not interested in girls, you know who I like, and there is not a snowballs chance in hell. He always hated me, always will." Harry replied_

Snape stopped in his thoughts as visions from the past several years flashed through his mind. His treatment of the young man, how he would take away points, yell at him, demean him in class. He was one of the only people who didn't fall over at the boy's feet, no. "He couldn't have been talking about me." Surely, Snape thought, that he doesn't think that I ever hated him, just his father. But I also had to act that way to keep him safe, keep him protected. Severus grumbled as he evaluated the thoughts swimming in his head.

* * *

The next two days passed painfully slow for Harry, but Thursday finally came. It was just before dinner and he was in his dorms getting dresses, or rather, Hermione was dressing him. She stood in front of his closet trying to decide what would look good on her best friend, as Ron sat on his bed flipping through a Quidditch magazine.

"Oh, Harry. I'm so excited for you! It's like a dream come true." Hermione said picking a few clothing items and handing them to him.

"Are we still talking about the dungeon bat?"

"It's not like he has said 'yes' yet 'Mione." Harry chuckled at her enthusiasm and Ron's comment.

"Oh, he won't be able to resist you by the time I'm though with you. Now, put these on."

Harry went to the bathroom and came out wearing an emerald green shirt and black trousers.

"This doesn't feel very flattering."

"It will, just give me a moment. Remove your glamour so that I can tailor the clothes." Harry removed the glamour as Hermione surveyed his appearance. She cast a few spells as he felt the clothes change and his hair shift.

"All done," she said looking rather proud of herself "go look in the mirror."

Harry snapped as a full length mirror appeared in front of him. He noticed how the shirt was made of a softer material and was more tailored, fitting to his muscles and showing off his fit figure, though he was hesitant about leaving the first few buttons undone as Hermione had insisted. The black pants were now the perfect length and fit rather snug around his thighs and rear. His sneakers were transfigured into a pair of black leather dress shoes with a sophisticated square toe. Harry noticed how his hair was pulled back into a casual low ponytail and tied with a silk ribbon that matched the green of his shirt.

"'Mione! I look great." He ran over and picked up the witch in a hug twirling her around. "Thank you. You know what this means right?"

"That Professor Snape won't be able to keep his hands off you?" Harry giggled as Ron make gagging noises in the background.

"I hope, but no. that if this look goes over well, I'll be dragging you along to Diagon Alley this weekend to pick up a new wardrobe for me." Hermione looked shocked at Harry, both boys noticed that look.

"Great one, mate. You just signed your own death certificate." Hermione hugged Harry as he heard Ron mumble something along the lines of "asking a woman to take you shopping? Gone barmy, he has."

Roughly thirty minutes later the three headed out of the dorms for dinner after Garry replaced the glamour. Snape's eyes settled on Harry as he walked into the Great Hall, noticing the obvious smile on his face that he didn't believe was just from the story Ron was telling. The three sat down next to Neville, who had just started putting food on his plate.

"Hey, Harry, Hermione, Ron. How are you three doing?"

"Great Neville" Ron and Hermione said as Harry nodded in agreement.

"How are you feeling?" Harry whispered so that only the four of them could hear it.

"Perfectly healed, thanks to you."

"No need to thank me, I'm just glad you're all better." Harry said with a smile as Neville began talking about a newly discovered plant in Brazil.

"Hey, Harry?" Neville asked after nearly all four of them had finished with dinner. "Why does Professor Snape keep staring at you? He's been looking at you all dinner." Harry thought he heard Ron and Hermione holding in a giggle, and Harry wasn't sure how to handle this. He had never told anyone but Ron and Hermione about his feelings for the older man. Neville would probably have a hard time accepting it, especially considering the Boggart ordeal in third year.

"I have detention with him after dinner and he is probably just deciding what chores to torture me with tonight. I personally hope that it is scrubbing cauldrons, I've done that enough times to where it is actually easy."

"You need to stop getting detentions, Harry." Hermione chimed in trying to defend Harry's story

"Yea, mate. What if he decides that next time it should be on a Quidditch practice day or something?" Ron said smirking at Harry.

"Point taken, I'm sorry. I'll work on it." Harry said as he looked up to the staff table and met eyes with Severus, who turned away to hide a blush as Harry winked at him.

* * *

After finishing his apple pie, Harry made his way to the dungeons. He went through all the possibilities in his mind of what might happen, what would most likely happen, he figured. He knocked on the potions classroom door.

"Enter."

Harry closed the door behind him as he removed his glamour. "Hello, Severus."He noticed something as he tuned around after hanging up his cloak.

Severus stared at Harry, how could he not? He took in the fit, slim body before him. The muscles under the soft green fabric, the slight pull of the almost-to-tight pants on the younger man's ass, the classy way that the entire outfit alluded to his slim body, but did not cling to it. Yes, Severus was going to have a hard time keeping his hands off the body in front of him. Severus was brought out of his trance when Harry stepped closer to the desk he sat at.

"Good evening, Harry." Severus placed his papers aside as he stood. "What potion do you plan on brewing tonight?"

"Actually, I was hoping we could get the talking done first. That way I may actually have a chance of focusing on the potion." Harry chuckled as he sat at the chair in front of the desk. Severus sat back down.

"Alright. I have a few questions before we decide anything." Severus said as his nervousness grew, slightly relaxing when he saw Harry roll his eyes.

"You always have questions, Severus." Harry said in mock accusatory tone as Severus glared at him.

"It does seem that way, doesn't it? Now, many nights ago, you talked to Ms. Granger and Mr. Weasley about who you liked, and commented that there wasn't a chance with them. Was this perhaps the same person whom you talked to me about several nights ago?"

"Yes, and you can wipe the worried look off your face, it's you. It's always been you." Harry blushed realizing what he said. "I just don't want you to think that I'm perhaps using you because I cannot attain someone else. I really like you."

"I like you too, Harry." Severus said as he walked around to his desk and leaned against it so that he would be closer to Harry. "But we still have several things to discuss before we can think of beginning a relationship. Now, relationships between teachers and of-age students are allowed if they are discreet. While it is not required, I believe that we should tell Albus, so that if something does happen to where word gets out, he can help deal with the rumors."

"I agree." Harry said as he saw Severus smile at him.

"Now, can I ask you personal questions?" Severus said

"I think that is only fair if I may ask the same of you." Harry said

"Of course. How-" Severus was interrupted as a raven flew in through the window. He pulled the parchment from the bird's leg as it flew over to Harry's outstretched left hand.

"Hello again, Annabelle Lee. You have a beautiful name; it reminds me of a poem by one of my favorite authors. Have you ever heard the poem that you were named after?" Severus looked up to hear his raven make a soft noise as Harry smiled, stroking the birds back with his right hand. Harry wondered if Severus had named the bird because of the poem, after all it did seem an awful coincidence, or if it was just a coincidence after all.

Severus pretended to keep reading the note from Dumbledore, asking for his attendance at his earliest convenience concerning the substitute Defense teacher, but his eyes watched Harry. He rarely saw Harry so carefree, maybe he simply likes my bird, Severus thought.

"You know, Severus," Harry said "we are alone. If you wish to look at me, you may do so." Harry smirked

"And here I was hoping that I would not have to deal with your cheek anymore, pity."

"Quite. So would you have named the raven Edgar were it male?" Harry asked.

"I see you are familiar with Mr. Poe's work then?"

"Very, he is one of my favorite authors. I'm quite surprised that you are so fond of muggle books." Harry said

"My father was a muggle; I read Poe's works many times over the summer. He is one of the few muggle authors that I enjoy. You are actually the first person to have connected the dots."

"It's not really that hard, once you think about it. But you picked a good name.

"Yes, well, I didn't believe that 'Nevermore' really suited her."

Harry laughed wondering when exactly he started to understand Severus' dry sense of humor. He pet the silky feathers then lifted his hand as the bird flew to her perch in the other room.

"As I was saying, before I was so rudely interrupted by my bird, have you ever been in a gay relationship before? I prefer to know the history of someone before I get involved."

"I have dated several men, but it's hard to be in a relationship with someone when you were the only person I really wanted. As far as sexual experience, I have fooled around, but I have never gone all the way with anyone before. I hope this does not cause a problem."

"Put all your worries aside. As I said before, I like to know what I'm getting into before pursuing a relationship."

"Completely understandable. Now, you know that I like you. How do you feel about me?" Harry asked standing up and leaning on the desk next to Severus

"I like you; I like you a lot actually. I'm drawn to you in a way that I have never felt with anyone before. I don't know if that means this will be permanent, but I would certainly like to be with you for a long time to come. I feel like I'm only just getting to know you, however, so I would prefer if we started off slow."

"I can agree to that. I'm rather surprised to be honest, I didn't think you would ever allow yourself to be with a student, much less, me."

"So, I guess now all I have to do is get up the courage to ask an amazingly handsome man to dinner on Saturday." Severus looked at Harry blushing.

"Why, Severus, are you flirting with me?" Harry asked in mock astonishment

"Indeed, is it working?"

"Perhaps." Harry replied smiling

"So, will you allow me to take you out for a date this Saturday?" Severs asked

"Yes." Harry smiled brighter

"Would you like to meet me here around six, we could have a nice dinner?"

"Yes." Harry said feeling slightly breathless as he locked his green eyes with the onyx ones in front of him. Severus brought a hand to cup Harry's cheek.

"Can I kiss you?" Severus asked, not wanting to overstep any boundaries in this fragile new relationship.

"Merlin, yes." Was all Harry could speak as he leaned into the man in front of him, lips touching, as a feeling like warmth spread through his body.

* * *

Remus sat in a chair in the Headmaster's office, having just finished talking about the classes he was going to cover in the other Professor's absence.

"Your rooms are ready for you, should you wish to move in tonight and get an early start, since you will be chaperoning the Hogsmeade trip this weekend."

"That sounds great! Do you think it would be possible for me to see Harry? I want to surprise him since he doesn't think I'm coming until Sunday."

"Of course, I believe that he is in the potions classroom right now, Severus told me that he was helping Harry with his 'horrid potion skills'" Both men laughed before Remus got up to leave.

"That sounds like Harry. Good evening, Albus. Thank you again."

"Of course, my boy." Dumbledore said as he went back to his paperwork.

* * *

Remus bounded down to the dungeons excited to see the surprise on Harry's face when he not only found out that he had come early, but when he would be chaperoning the Hogsmeade trip this weekend. Remus knocked on the door several times. 'Strange, maybe they didn't hear me' Remus thought as he opened the door to walk in. However, the sight that greeted him, was one he never thought he would be subjected to.

* * *

Harry had both his hands tangled in Severus' hair as he pressed their lips closer together. Severus' tongue mapped the roof of Harry's mouth as one hand held on to the younger man's hip, the other spread out on the small of Harry's back pulling his whole body closer to him. Harry moaned and leaned in closer to Severus' embrace as both men pulled apart suddenly at the sound of a door slamming shut and a loud voice that sounded like it was struggling to keep anger in check.

"What the HELL is going on?!" Remus asked slamming the door shut and casting a silencing spell. He noticed how fast both men jumped apart at the sound of his voice. Harry broke from Severus, but Severus held Harry's hand in his.

-Thats the chapter for now. Hoped you like it. I'm sorry for making it another cliffie, but it was that or wait a few more days, and I hate having to make people wait if they can at least have a taste fo what is going to happen. The next one will be posted soon, hopefully.

Please Read and Review- your comments keep me going!


	7. Did Not Go As Hoped

_Harry had both his hands tangled in Severus' hair as he pressed their lips closer together. Severus' tongue mapped the roof of Harry's mouth as one hand held on to the younger man's hip, the other spread out on the small of Harry's back pulling his whole body closer to him. Harry moaned and leaned in closer to Severus' embrace as both men pulled apart suddenly at the sound of a door slamming shut and a loud voice that sounded like it was struggling to keep anger in check._

"_What the HELL is going on?!" Remus asked slamming the door shut and casting a silencing spell. He noticed how fast both men jumped apart at the sound of his voice. Harry broke from Severus, but Severus held Harry's hand in his._

"Remus! What are you doing here?"

"I decided to arrive early for the teaching position, and it appears that it's a good thing I did!"

"Remus, calm down. Why don't we all sit down for some tea? Hmmm? Severus, will you show me to your kitchen so that I can brew some?" Harry glared at Severus

"Of course, Harry." Severus stood and led Harry into the kitchen just a few rooms away. Severus closed the door behind him.

"So, would you care to explain why we are inviting the wolf to stay when he is clearly seething at the both of us?"

"Because Remus is my honorary Godfather, he needs to see that we care for each other. I bet if we told him what brought us together he would be more than happy for us both." Harry said slightly louder than needed. Harry set his fingertips on Snape's temples. "Remus' werewolf senses will be able to hear everything we say to each other, will you let me into your mind so that I can speak to you?" Harry whispered

"As in telepathy? Merlin, Harry! Do you have any idea how rare that is?"

"Now is not the time to marvel at my powers, will you allow me or not?"

Severus nodded as Harry flooded his mind and the boy's voice spoke in his head

"_Severus, we do need to explain this to Remus if we don't want him hexing your balls off. Now, we are going to sit and explain everything to him in a relaxed and adult manner. Now, ever so discreetly, grab me some calming draught."_ Harry pulled his hands away from his lover's head and snapped as three tea mugs appeared with steeping tea in them. Severus put his arms around Harry's waist and set his head on his shoulder as he watched Harry put a slight amount of the potion into one of the cups.

"Don't you think that you are over reacting? If you really need some, then I can give you some calming draught later." Severus whispered in Harry's ear as quietly as possible.

"I appreciate the offer, but this is not my cup." Harry whispered back.

"Then what are you doing?" Severus whispered rather concerned when he noticed the devious smirk on Harry's face.

"Taking a cue from Albus." Harry whispered as he dropped two sugar cubes into the tea and left with his and Remus' mug. Severus stood in shock before following Harry out of the room. 'That is rather…Slytherin. And when did Harry learn that Albus laced his guest's tea with Calming Potion?'

Harry handed Remus a mug.

"It's Earl Grey with 2 sugars and a splash of milk, just the way you like it."

"Thank you, Harry." Remus said sitting back down.

"So," Severus began after sitting across from Remus "May I ask how you got through the wards? Harry always casts rather powerful wards before removing his glamour?"

"I did not detect any wards." Remus said looking at Harry as the young man grew a horrified expression on his face

"Shit! I was so nervous to talk to Severus that I forgot to throw up the wards that I normally do."

Severus glared at the young man in front of him. "Well, then we should be grateful that it was only Remus that walked in."

"So, Harry. When did Severus learn about your glamour?"

Over the course of the next hour, Harry retold the story to Remus, who looked disbelieving at the sweet story being presented to him.

"So let me get this straight? You have secretly been in love with your potions master for several years, when you never bothered tell me that you were gay? He knows about your glamour, and about your treatment at the Dursleys?"

"Yes." Harry looked down ashamed that he never told Remus about his orientation.

"Why didn't you ever tell me that you were gay?"

"Because you would have asked who I liked, and I couldn't tell you that I was in love with my teacher. I don't think that would have gone over well." Harry smirked trying to lighten the mood.

"Yes, I'm so much more impressed now." Remus almost spat then pinched the bridge of his nose and closed his eyes. "Look, I understand young love; I do, but Harry, its Severus."

Harry crossed his arms warning Remus not to go where Harry feared he was going. "I'm so glad that you are aware of his identity."

"Don't take that tone with me. Really, Harry, couldn't you date someone else, anyone else?" Remus pleaded.

"Why would I want to date anyone other than the person I loved?"

"Because it's Snivellus for Merlin's sake!" Remus said standing

"DON'T CALL HIM THAT! If you got your head out of your ass and let go of your prejudice, you would see what a wonderful, talented, intelligent, and beautiful man he is!"

"He is old enough to be your father!"

"If it doesn't bother me than why should it bother you?"

"Severus put a stop to this please!" Remus begged as Severus stood

"Why should I? Because it will help you sleep better at night? Because you're afraid what everyone will say? I have done a lot of regrettable things in my life, but choosing to be with Harry is not one of them. We discussed everything at length before coming to a decision. He understands my role as a spy, and I understand his role in this war. We both acknowledge that we may not live through it, but until then, we have happiness within each other. Surely you can understand that if nothing else?"

Remus was across the room in the blink of an eye and had Severus' teaching robes clutched in his fists and Harry was glad that he had put the calming potion in Remus' cup.

"You are disgusting! He is just a young boy; he doesn't know what he wants!"

"I believe that if you talk to him you will find that he is anything but a boy, and he is rather sure in his choices." Harry watched on horrified, he knew that Severus was restraining himself for Harry's sake, but Severus was a grown man and could take care of himself; however what Remus said next brought anger into every fiber of Harry's being, since he called Severus the same thing that Vernon called Harry from a young age.

"You're a FREAK!" Remus yelled as he pushed Severus harder against his desk, but before the potions master could reach for his wand, Remus was pushed several feet away from Severus and couldn't grasp why until he saw the murderous rage on Harry's face.

"THAT'S ENOUGH! I will not stand here and listen to you insult my boyfriend, whether you care for him or not! I know exactly what I want, and what I want is Severus." Harry strode toward Remus with a murderous air around him, one of the glass bottles began to crack under the magical force that Harry was giving off. "You DARE use that word to describe him again, and you will find yourself in an abyss of severe pain that you cannot even fathom. You KNOW the associations with that word! And one more thing Remus Lupin, if you accept me than you accept Severus, honorary godfather or not!"

"Of course I accept you, Harry! But this…situation" Remus said as he closed in on Harry, who in turn only drew his wand higher. Remus then realized how bad he must have hurt his godson if he was drawing his wand on him. "It is ridiculous, and disgusting!" Remus said as he put his hand down as Harry lowered his wand with anger in his eyes. "Gods! Even Sirius would have been ashamed of you." Remus breathed out as he crossed his arms looking away only to have his attention caught by a shattering vial on a nearby table.

"Harry…" Severus said as he moved closer to the boy who was now holding back tears. The tall man reached out his hands and cupped Harry's face gently as tears cascaded down.

Remus had never seen a look of pure pain on the young man's face before. His eyes alternated between being closed as if by doing so they could expel the pain, or open and flowing with tears. His jaw locked tight and the frown upon his lips as if the whole world was against him and he was giving up.

"I'm sorry, Severus. I just need to be alone for a bit. I will contact you later." Harry said as he left the room in a hurry, barely spelling his glamour on in time as he left the room.

Severus looked to Remus with a murderous stare. "You are no longer welcome in my chambers Mr. Lupin. Please remove yourself."

"I'm-" Remus began before he was interrupted by the glaring potions master.

"That was not a request, it was an order. Now leave before I find a use for all the horrid things I learned as a Death Eater." Severus glared at him, imposing himself, the air around him crackling with anger, as Remus walked out of the room hanging his head in shame.


	8. Weaknesses Revealed

Harry stormed up through the castle on his way up to the Room of Requirements. 'How dare Remus act like that!' Harry thought. 'I love Severus, is that not enough?' Other students pressed themselves against the castle walls in an attempt to escape the obvious anger that Harry was harboring. Harry walked into a deserted corridor and sent a Patronus to Hermione telling her his location. He concentrated on what he needed and walked through large metal doors into a very large room.

* * *

Severus strode through the halls with a purpose only to find himself in front of the Gryffindor common rooms. He strode in after saying the password and found exactly who he had needed to talk to.

"Ms. Granger, may I speak to you for a moment?" All the Gryffindors stared at both her and Professor Snape, as she stood up behind a large mound of paperwork and walked over to the dour looking man.

"What is it you wish to speak to me about professor?" Hermione nearly trembled

"Your last paper was not preformed to your usual standards, perhaps we should speak in private?" Snape inquired as the common room burst into whispers.

"Of course, professor." Hermione said as she led Snape out into a deserted corridor and cast a silencing charm around them. "Now, what is this really about?" Hermione said much more sure of herself than before.

"Nothing escapes you, does it, Ms. Granger?"

"You are the Slytherin head of house and you just walked into the Gryffindor common room, experience tells me that it is something far more dire than a paper."

"Indeed." Snape replied "About three hours ago Harry stormed out of my office after a rather…difficult discussion with Mr. Lupin. He told me that he would send word yet he has not done so. I was hoping that you would know his whereabouts. I have walked the castle and grounds twice and have yet to locate him." Snape finished and both parties looked worried.

"No. He sent me a Patronus several hours ago telling me that he would be in the ror." Have you checked there?"

"The roar?" Snape asked looking puzzled

"The R.O.R. - the Room of Requirement. He often goes there when he trains or when he is in an awful mood. I knew that he was visiting you tonight so I just figured that he was training. I will have to escort you there, Harry wards it so that it is password protected; only Ron, or I can get in. Let me grab something from my room, first." Several moments later Hermione appeared from the portrait which she has just run back through. "Come on," Hermione started towards the seventh floor "We don't have a lot of time to waste."

"What do you mean? Is he in danger?"

"Only from himself. Sometimes he trains so hard he works himself to exhaustion." Hermione began. "But when he trains under anger or worry, well, he pushes himself too far. When Sirius died a few years back, he made the dummies, which were only able to perform low level spells before, able to perform more complicated spells."

"What kind of spells?" Snape said walking past the roving staircase.

"Well, I talked to him once after I watched him train. He said that in the final battle he would be up against Death Eaters and that would not be using low level spells. He requires the dummies to be powerful; they can perform all but the Killing Curse. He replaces the Killing curse with the Cruciatus Curse; so, if he is hit with that particular curse, then he knows that in real life, he would have been killed. He hasn't had to use the room to control his emotions for quite some time; in fact he only trains once a week any more. Not even his nightmares are bothering him as much."

"Why would anyone put themselves through that? He is crazy, stupid, or exceptionally brave." Severus mumbled before Hermione tripped over a cobblestone. Snape held his hand out and pulled her to her feet. She dusted herself off before resuming the quick walk.

"He said the same thing about you, many years ago; when he found out that you were a spy. We are almost there, when you go in, take these." Hermione handed Severus a small pouch. "There are strong pain relief potions, Blood replenishing potions, Draught of Peace for anxiety, antidotes for petrification, as well as some Skele-Gro, antidotes and slaves for burns, cuts, and bruises, and a small bottle of Nerve Replenishing Potion in case of emergency."

"Where did you get all of these?" Snape asked

"I brewed them myself."

"And he would need nerve repair potions for…?" Snape asked curious as he put the pouch in his pocket.

"Surely, Professor, you are aware of the long term effects of the Cruciatus curse?" Hermione asked

"But nerve damage only occurs after more than ten minutes exposure!" Snape nearly yelled

"I know, but I have had to use them on more than one occasion. Now let's go. " Hermione said as she crossed the corridor and walked back and forth until a door appeared. "Orion" She cast a silencing spell before peeking through a small hole in the door.

"What are you doing? We don't have time for this-" Severus urged

"We have to make sure he is at a stopping point, or he could get startled and hit us with a hex." Hermione said before looking in. "He is training to music right now, he should be done in a few minutes, and then you can go in when it is safe-"

"I am not a child, Ms. Granger. I am quite proficient in defense." Snape said before pulling the door open; however the sight he was expecting was not what he saw. He pulled the door open and was nearly blown back by the loud music that flowed fourth, which he recognized as an intense almost angry sounding tune behind Italian words. Snape closed the door behind him

* * *

Harry let the music of **All'Improvviso Amore **overwhelm his senses. With each beat of the fast music he cast a different spell at the oncoming dummies, his hands flicking with each spell cast, and his arms and body moving fluidly as if dancing. After the slow tempo of the first verse, the music picked up pace along with the attacking dummies, they came at him from all sides, even from above. Harry alternated between casting spells from his wand and using wandless magic, but as the song went on the dummies outnumbered him twenty to one, they closed in on him as he crouched to the ground, they hovered over him…

* * *

Severus watched the dummies outnumber him; he was worried about Harry's safety since she mentioned the dark curses the dummies were allowed to cast. He saw Harry crouch down as they gathered around him. He felt magic in the air crackle as he saw the wand fly out of the young man's grip.

* * *

Harry threw his wand in the air and yelled, thrusting his hands out to the side as if pushing the enemies away, as they all became engulfed in a large ball of flame, instantly turning to ash and falling to the ground around a panting Harry, who gracefully caught his wand. The anger in his eyes apparent as he cast a last hex to the one remaining dummy as the song ended, but Harry's eyes went wide as the dummy dodged and he hex hit a box behind. Harry stormed over to the dummy that remained still as Harry thrust his wand into his throat; Harry prepared to cast a spell as the Boggart flew out of the box and behind Harry taking the form of Sirius.

* * *

Severus began to snap out of his reverie and strode towards the length of the large room as he saw the Boggart take the form of Black and put his hands on Harry's shoulders.

* * *

Harry instantly forgot about the hex he was going to cast when he felt hands tightly grip his shoulders. He felt the long, wavy, black hair brush against his neck as his dead godfather whispered in his ear

"Are you afraid Harry? Afraid of one of the few people who cared for you, afraid of the man you killed?"

Harry reeled back and faced the all-too-realistic likeness of Sirius. "I didn't kill you!" Harry shouted

Sirius' face took on an evil expression of pure anger. "YOU LET ME DIE! THAT'S EVEN WORSE! I'M DEAD! ALL BECAUSE OF YOU, YOU WORTHLESS BOY!"

* * *

Severus knew that the form of Sirius would pain Harry, but when he heard what the Black-look-alike yelled, he knew that something was seriously wrong. Boggarts were not able to talk under normal circumstances, only if they are feeding off of the power of the person in front of them. Severus sped up and was running as he heard Harry yell…

* * *

"I didn't mean too! I never wanted you to die!"

"It's too late for apologies! I only hope that one of these days, a weakling like you, will finally gain the courage to finally jump out of that tower, once and for all!"

Harry fell to his knees in shock, not seeing the dummy behind him cast a Cruciatus Curse at his back. Harry writhed on the floor, jerking in pain, as he heard shouts from above him. "No one wants you! Your uncle didn't want you, your aunt, even your own parents. Hell, you are dumber than you thought if you think that Severus could possibly love something as disgusting as you. Your uncle was right; you deserved every beating, every hurtful word. You deserved it all!" The Boggart laughed as Harry gave into the darkness surrounding him; Harry barely heard the loud "Riddikulus" cast by Severus as his eyes fell closed.

* * *

Snape pulled Harry into his arms as he fished the pouch from his pocket pulling out the necessary vials. He brought them to the young man's lips, one by one, massaging his throat to make the potions go down. Severus pulled Harry close against his chest as he rocked back and forth, petting the soft black hair and whispering confirmations in the young man's ear.

"It's going to be okay, Harry. Everything will be all right. I love you; we can get through this…"

Hermione ran into the room and found her Professor rocking her friend back and forth. He was whispering words of comfort, though whether it was to the unconscious Harry or to himself, she was not sure.

"Professor, Harry keeps his invisibility cloak in his right pocket. Cover yourself and take him to Madam Pomfrey. I will tell the Headmaster what happened." Hermione saw Snape nod his head and reach for the cloak, though the tears that Severus tried to hide as he pulled the hood on the cloak, did not escape Hermione's notice. She ran out of the Room of Requirement and up to Dumbledore's office, ignoring shouts from Filtch about curfew.

* * *

Thank You for waiting so long, I've been scrambling to get papers due since the end of the school semester is upon me. The next chapter should be up soon, I may include a hot scene between Sev and Harry, if not in the next chapter, then the one after at the very latest. Thank you again for reading.

I would like it very much if you would review! Xoxo -Blossoming Nightshade.


	9. Recovery

Dumbledore burst through the double doors into the infirmary with Hermione trailing at his heels. "Poppy, what's wrong with Harry?" Dumbledore said walking briskly to the young man's side.

"Nothing a few dreamless sleeps, pain potions and rest won't cure. Though Severus took care of most of the work for me." Poppy motioned to the professor who was gripping Harry's limp hand, tears falling down his face, praying to Merlin that Harry was alright. Dumbledore nodded to Poppy, who ushered Hermione out of the room, then set a firm hand on Severus' shoulder.

Severus looked up with tear tracks down his cheeks. "Albus, when did you arrive?" Severus asked curiously.

"Just a few moments ago. Perhaps we should talk, my boy." Dumbledore began to walk to a table with some tea on the other side of the room.

Severus stood up and let go of Harry's hand. "I'll be right back, love." Severus said as he pushed the young man's wild hair away and kissed him gently on the forehead, and then walked to where the Headmaster was seated.

"Needless to say I was quite surprised when Ms. Granger burst through my door in the middle of the night. As you might guess, I have a few questions." Dumbledore looked at Severus over his small glasses, eyes twinkling wildly.

"Of course, Albus."

"Ms. Granger told me everything that happened tonight in the Room of Requirements, and how she admitted you, but she was unable to tell me what it was, exactly, that set young Harry off."

"Well, your new Defense teacher felt the need to barge in my office tonight, which sparked an argument between Harry, Lupin, and myself. Lupin said some rather unkind things to Harry, who then took off to that ridiculous room!"

"And what was it that he said exactly?" Dumbledore wondered.

"I believe that it began once Lupin called me a 'freak', but escalated once Lupin said something about even Black being ashamed of the decisions he has made." Severus answered crossing his arms in front of his chest, the desire to run out and attack the wolf overwhelming.

"And what decision would that be?" the headmaster wondered.

"Harry and I have recently begun a relationship. We had just finished discussing it, and how we were going to inform you of it in a few days time, when Lupin barged in my room in a slightly compromising position." Severus tinged red with anger at the mere memory. Dumbledore however tinged only the slightest pink, and that was only to those who were looking.

"Hahaa. Congratulations, my boy!" Dumbledore exclaimed as his hands came together in a single clap.

"Excuse me?" Severus asked dumbfounded

"Harry has liked you for quite some time now, though he never told me as much. Had I known that you were returning your feelings or even having that conversation, I would have told Remus to retire for the night. As it stands though, since I was under the influence that he was taking extra potions classes to help his grade, I urged Remus to go and surprise Harry since he had arrived to the castle early. I apologize."

Severus was baffled, he expected Albus to be slightly off put by the difference in age, or the fact that Harry was still a student, but Albus was happy for them? All the easier for the two of us, he supposed.

"There is no need to apologize, Albus." Severus said looking away uncomfortably.

"So," The headmaster said picking up his tea cup. "How much do you actually know about Harry?"

"Is that a subtle way of asking whether of not I am aware of his glamour?" Severus said picking up his tea cup in return.

"It was, though apparently not as subtle as I hoped." Dumbledore chuckled.

"It was actually that very matter that got us together, though I will allow Harry to tell you the exact story. It is a bit too Gryffindor for my tastes, though I was surprised that he was willing to sit down and discus the properties of our relationship with me, I figured that he would simply dive in, as he too often does." Severus said with a smirk that, he hoped, hid his fondness of the young man.

"Leave it to you, Severus, to do something as unromantic as discussing a relationship before agreeing to it." Dumbledore said laughingly

"What, exactly, is that supposed to mean?"

"I simply mean that you are lucky that Harry was willing to do that at all. He is a hormonal 17 year old, you are lucky that you could even get him to sit still before snogging your brains out." Albus set his tea down, unable to hold it still through his intense roars of laughter.

"Albus!" Severus all but yelled, face beet red with embarrassment.

"Haaahaa. Forgive me, my boy, but it is true." Albus said before reining control of his laughter.

"Perhaps." Severus said wondering if he had been acting a bit too…Slytherin.

"Perhaps you should do something a little bit Gryffindor for him." Albus winked as he got up from his chair

"What do you mean?" Severus inquired

"A home cooked dinner by candle light, perhaps. Or since you have already asked for Ms. Granger's advice once, you could always do it again." Albus was interrupted as both men heard a groan coming from Harry's bed. Albus hurried over only to be beaten there by a running Snape.

"Harry, how are you feeling?" Snape asked sitting on the edge of the bed, holding one hand while stroking Harry's warm forehead with the other slim hand.

"Mmm, sore, tired, nightmare." Harry said as he noticed the Headmaster for the first time. "Albus? What are you doing here?"

"I came to see how you are doing, Harry, and to say that I am sorry. The old often don't realize that they are asking so much of the young."

"Sorry? For what? You haven't done anything."

"Perhaps not directly, but I fear I may have put too much stress on you about the prophecy." Albus looked to the floor in shame.

"Albus…" Harry began "It was not the prophecy that brought me to the infirmary, you have nothing to worry about." Harry looked into his mentor's eyes. "So, I take it that Severus told you about our relationship?"

"Yes, Harry. How did you know?" Snape asked curiously.

"Hehe," Harry barked out a laugh. "Because his eyes only twinkle like that when he knows some sort of information that no one else knows."

Severus looked at Albus who burst out into laughter. "Oh, you know me too well, young Harry." Albus wiped his eye of a stray tear and stood up.

"Harry, it is late and I believe that you should get some rest. Severus, I will leave the matter of Lupin to you and Harry, since it has nothing to do with me. Though, I had better find him alive and intact for teaching in two days time."

"In two days time?" Severus inquired with a curiosity that matched the look on Harry's face.

"You boys don't think I would allow you to go back to school so quickly after this, do you? You shall take two days off. I will have Ms. Granger and Mr. Weasley take notes for Harry and I will have a substitute for you Severus. Enjoy the time off my boys." Dumbledore said before closing the door to the infirmary as his eyes twinkled madly.

Severus looked down at Harry, who shifted to the edge of his bed and lay on his side. He noticed the dark circles under Harry's eyes, how even moving seemed to demand great effort; he noticed how the shivering young man pulled the thin sheet tighter around him. "Are you cold, Harry?" Severus asked before the boy simply nodded in response. Severus put a gentle hand on Harry's face "I will be right back, I promise." Harry nodded in understanding as he watched the older man disappear into a floo of green flames. Harry sighed and closed his eyes, not hearing or seeing the floo activate again as Severus stepped out.

Severus walked over to the young man and smiled at his innocent looking face as he placed a heavy green and purple quilt over him gently. Harry looked up and looked at the quilt, before looking back to Severus with an almost blindingly beautiful smile. Severus smirked "It's my favorite quilt; I use it whenever I get really bad nightmares." Severus began running his fingers through Harry's hair as he told his lover the story "My mother sewed it for me, it was my birthday gift when I was twelve. She planned it when I got my Hogwarts Letter. She was a brilliant witch, my mother, always secretly teaching me things when my muggle father wasn't looking, or when he was at work. She was so proud of me when I got my letter, she couldn't stop smiling. The next day she went out and picked out my two favorite colors of cloth to make me this quilt, but she waited until I was in school to start sewing it for me, so that it would be a surprise. It is one of the few things I have left that remind me of her. She died shortly before my 14th birthday, in a car accident. The muggle hospitals simply couldn't help her with their primitive medicine. My mother was the only person who was nice to me, until I met Lily, your mum. But, even though I still have a few trinkets that belonged to my mother, the quilt is still my favorite." Severus finished his story as he ran his fingers over the old, but still new looking cloth.

"Thank you for letting me use it, it is beautiful." Harry said looking at Severus with weary eyes.

"Get some rest, Harry, you need it." Said the older man as he ran his fingers through Harry's hair.

"Will you lie next to me?" Harry whispered afraid of the scolding or rejection that he figured he would get.

"If that is what you would like me to do?" Severus said, noticing the quick, excited nod of Harry's head, as he pulled the quilt back to allow him to slip under. Severus pulled off his shoes and slipped under the covers, wrapping Harry into his arms, and kissing him on the forehead.

"Now go to sleep, I will be here when you wake up."

"Do you promise?" Harry sleepily asked

"I promise." Severus whispered as he felt Harry drift to sleep in his arms, a smile on both men's lips.

* * *

I know it is sort of a set back-since I'm sure you all were looking foreward to Snape's confrontation with Remus- but rest assured- that will be in the next chapter! it will be glorious. I wanted to include it in this chapter-i really did- but i just couldnt get it to work in, especially with how long it's going to be. :)

Next time, my pretties, next time.

As always, Reviews are awesome!


	10. Revenge

Severus woke to the smell of Harry invading his nostrils, he pulled Harry tighter against him and breathed in his scent only a few more times before Harry began to stir and rub his eyes.

"Good morning, Harry."

"Morning, Sev" Harry said looking up at the man and smiling

"Sev?" the man asked smirking

"Well, it is either that or Puddin', your pick." Harry said as a look of horror washed over Snape's face.

"Sev will be just fine; just don't call me that in public." Harry giggled and kissed the older man.

"I like waking up like this" Harry confessed

"As do I, you smell wonderful." Severus said

"Sev, I probably smell like healing salve." Harry said condescendingly

"Perhaps, a bit, but under that, you have an intoxicating scent, it smells like a fresh spring rain mixed with fresh apples." Harry giggled at the older man's confession

"I'm not entirely sure how you determined that, but I suppose I could always smell worse." Harry said laughing.

"Indeed. This big nose comes in handy for something."

"Your nose isn't big." Harry said chastising, as Severus looked at him with a raised eyebrow

"Ok, maybe a bit, but I think it's perfect." Harry said as he landed a peck on the older man's nose, before nuzzling into his neck. "Sandalwood and Cardamom." Harry stated plainly

"What?"

"That's what you smell like, Sandalwood and Cardamom. Spicy yet gentle." Harry said as Severus flashed him a smile.

"Harry, I wanted to thank you for standing up for me to Remus. You are only the third person in my life to do something like that for me."

"Of course, Severus, in fact, we will probably have a lot of opposition like that so you'd better get used to it. After all, I'm a rather defensive Gryffindor." Harry said smiling. "Who were the others?"

"Your mother, back when we were at Hogwarts."

"And the second?" Harry wondered, knowing what had transpired between his parents and Snape, since Albus had told him after the pensieve fiasco. But he wondered who the third would be.

"Lucius Malfoy."

"Malfoy Sr.?!"

"Yes. We have been friends since our Hogwarts days."

"Wow. Ok, I didn't know that. I thought you were only pretending to be friends with him because of your spy status." Harry confessed looking at Snape.

"No, he is my best friend, one of the few. His wife and Draco are like family to me."

"Oh, ok."

"What wrong?" Snape asked taking in the look of fear on the young man's face.

"He's going to kill me when he finds out about us, isn't he?" Harry asked seriously.

"Harry, no one will lay a finger on you, I won't allow it. He is actually a spy for the light side. Now don't get me wrong, he is still the pompous pure-blood that he always was, but shortly after I turned spy, he confessed how he hated being a Death Eater and I scheduled a meeting between him and Dumbledore. He's been on the light side ever since."

"Oh, well that's good to know, actually. But I was thinking less about the Boy-Who-Lived aspect, and more about the 'I'm in a relationship with his best friend' aspect." Harry confessed as Severus burst out in laughter.

"No, I think you will be safe." Severus felt Harry relax in his arms. "But I have a favor to ask."

"Anything."

"Will you try and get along with my Godson?"

"Draco?" Harry looked up at Severus to see his affirming nod.

"He's going through a rather…difficult period in his life right now. He could use, as much as I dread saying it, someone outside of Slytherin to befriend." Severus let out a breath he didn't realize he'd been holding when he felt Harry nod

"I will try, but 5 years is a lot of history to go through, so it could be a while before he trusts me."

"That is why I'm simply asking for you to try."

"I will do my best." Harry said grunting as he tried to sit up.

"Harry, what did the Boggart mean when it was talking about you finally jumping out of a tower?" Harry stiffened, eyes growing wide. Harry had hoped that Severus had not heard anything that the Boggart said. "What did he mean Harry?" Snape's voice gently demanded "Have you been thinking about jumping to your death? Have you thought about it? About suicide? Is that what it was talking about? Answer me."

Harry's hands tightly gripped the quilt, nearly shaking. "Yes"

"Yes to what?" Snape dared to ask, afraid of the answer

"All of your questions-yes, I thought of suicide, quite a lot actually. I haven't been thinking about it since I began your potions lessons, I've been much too happy lately for that, but yes, suicidal thoughts are something that I often struggle with."

"But…why?" Severus asked, as he swallowed down the bile that threatened to rise. Harry rose to his feet and walked towards the window, where sun poured in and surrounded him in a beautiful yellow light.

"Have you ever gone to the Astronomy tower at night, Severus?" Harry asked over his shoulder

"I'm afraid that I cannot say that I have."

"That's unfortunate. The view of the stars from those windows is simply…breathtaking. They are so bright, so big, and so beautiful. Looking at something as massive as the sky, and thinking about all the galaxies and solar systems beyond, well, it makes you feel…small. It makes you _know_ that you are small, that nothing you do _really_ matters in the big picture. I felt like this a lot after Sirius died, and to some extent, I still feel it today. I know that killing Voldemort will have a big impact in the Wizarding world, even if it will only be a mild speck to the rest of the galaxy. But as horrible as this sounds, I don't care about all the innocent lives as much as I should, as much as I did when I was much younger. The only thing I care about anymore is the people I love, and if killing Voldemort is the only way to ensure their safety, then I will do it. I will protect you, Ron and Hermione, all the Weasley's, Remus and Dumbledore. They are all my friends, and I would do anything for them. But Sirius, when he died, I didn't lose a friend, Severus, I lost a life. I lost the life of happiness that I could have had living in a cottage with him 'til we grew old, I lost the chance to have someone my parents loved watch over me, I lost the chance to have someone beside me when I fought the monster who killed my parents, I lost a part of me, because I knew that no matter what, he would accept me. Even now, despite what Remus says, I know that he could be happy for me, for _us_. I lost my mother and father years ago Severus, but when Sirius died, when he fell through that veil, after Bellatrix stole him from me…he was like a father to me and I a son, to him, I lost the only family I cared for. I was alone. My whole world was turned upside-down, everything bright was shrouded in darkness, and for a long time I forgot what happiness felt like. So yes, I considered jumping to my death from those windows many times, though now, since I have you, I am happy that I was too cowardly to jump from them." Harry looked back at Severus, eyes brimming with tears, tracks of liquid streaking his cheeks, hands clenched in fists, yet his shoulder tilted downward in sadness. Severus walked over to him and wiped his cheeks as Harry managed a small smile.

"Did you ever think that you didn't jump because you are not a coward?" Severus said looking in his bright green eyes.

"What do you mean?"

"It's easy to die, but it is so much harder to live. Perhaps the reason you did not jump was bravery, you were brave enough not to jump because you knew that there was something _worth_ living for?"

"Like you?" harry asked

"Like my love for you. I love you, Harry. Everything that Boggart said was a lie, so many people love you. But remember that most importantly, _I_ love you. I have only been dating you a day, and already, I can't imagine my life without you. You have opened a part of me that has been dead for a very long time. You saved me from a life of believing that no one could ever love me."

"I love you too, Severus" Harry said as he brought his lips up to meet his love's, kissing passionately until both broke away

"Why don't you go get a hot bath and relax, Albus wanted to speak to you this morning. I have an errand to run, but I will be back shortly." Severus said.

"Alright." Harry replied making his way to the large bathroom.

* * *

"Harry!" Dumbledore greeted as the young man walked into the office and removed his glamour "It's great to see you. I'm so glad that you are looking better. Sit, sit." Harry sat in the plush chair in front of the Headmaster's desk as Albus called a house elf for tea and breakfast scones. "Now, Harry, I wanted to talk to you about something important." Albus said looking serious

"Of course." Harry said indicating that he allowed the old man to continue.

"Harry, if I may admit, last night terrified me. I was so worried about you, that it took all my will power to listen to Ms. Granger's story before running down to see to you myself. Severus agrees with a decision that I have made."

"What is that, sir?"

"That the Room of Requirements will no longer be available to you as training grounds."

"But I have to train to defeat Voldemort!" Harry shouted from his chair as Albus put up a hand to stop his tirade.

"I know, and I am not discouraging any training that you may believe that you need, far from it, I am simply requiring you to train with Severus from now on. Anytime, day or night, that you need to deal with emotion, or to simply practice spells, you will go to him. He has agreed to this arrangement and has given you entry to his rooms."

"I suppose that is understandable." Harry said looking down admitting defeat.

"Harry, before you leave, I want you to understand something. You have many friends, all of them love you and care for you deeply, not one of them, not _one_, will be disappointed if for some reason, you cannot defeat Voldemort. So please, do not push yourself so hard. Though at any rate, a certain Potions Master tells me that you could probably do it without straining yourself too hard." Albus finished looking downward at Harry over his spectacles as his eyes twinkled furiously.

"Severus said that?" Harry asked surprised

"Indeed, though I believe his exact words were 'Thank Merlin that Harry is on the side of the Light. If he were to ever go dark, he could have the world wrapped around his finger before we even knew it. He is so powerful; he could defeat the Dark Lord without breaking a sweat.' Though I would appreciate if you did not tell him of my informing you to his wisdom; I do not desire to have the bodily harm that Severus threatened befall me." Albus finished with a laugh.

"Albus that doesn't make sense, Voldemort is the second most powerful wizard alive, it would be impossible to beat him so effortlessly." Harry said still mentally laughing at the Headmaster's last words.

"Harry, how long were you training in that room?" Albus asked hoping that Harry would prove his point.

"Maybe an hour after dinner ended all the way up until Severus saved me apparently."

"I see, so for about say two and a half to three hours? And were you training the whole time? Using magic and spells the entire time?"

"Yes, sir but I don't see what that has to do with anything." Albus smiled at him

"It has everything to do with everything. You were using advanced magic, Harry. At least that is what I could gather from Severus, once he finished being in awe of your power and skill. Power at that level, Harry, drains a wizard very quickly, especially if some of the magic is wandless. A normal witch or wizard, after casting the spells that you did, that is assuming they could do them, would go unconscious from Magical Exhaustion after only a short amount of time. Even a fully-trained and advanced wizard could have lasted no more than an hour and a half, at the most. Harry, you have so much power, and yet you continue to underestimate your abilities."

"What do you mean, sir?" harry asked, wondering exactly where the old man's tangent was going.

"I think, Harry, that while you have spent so much time training to beat Voldemort, you have surpassed him in power. After our confrontation at the Ministry of Magic, Severus informed me that Voldemort had to rest for an entire day before he could perform any high level spells again, and we only battled for around thirty minutes. I do believe Harry, that you could defeat Voldemort, without any more training. So please, don't push yourself so hard."

"Alright. I'm sorry to worry all of you."

"We were quite worried, but I'm glad that you are alright"

"Thank you, sir. I'd better return to the infirmary for my final checkup, I don't want Madam Pomfrey to find out that I've been wandering off while she's at lunch." Harry said before retreating from the old man's office.

"Indeed." laughed Dumbledore "That could be quite detrimental to one's health."

* * *

Remus held the note in his hands that Severus had owled him earlier that day,

"_Mr. Lupin,_

_Meet me in my office after your fourth class and before lunch. My portrait will let you in._

_Severus Snape_"

Remus looked at the portrait in front of him and felt a sort of fear creep into his body, like a chill infecting him, as the portrait swung aside and bid him entrance.

"Severus?" Remus called out as he walked towards the chair in the middle of the room and sat down, wondering what the small table in front of him was for. He didn't have to ponder long, because Severus came out of the shadows and swooped down upon Remus like a hawk. He has his best scowl on, one he reserved only for 'fellow' Death Eaters. His top of his cloak billowed from him, making him appear bigger than he was as he circled Remus. Severus could see the lightest sheen of sweat beginning to appear on his prey's brow, and smiled inwardly at the thought of Remus being nervous because of him. Severus paused in front of the table looking at the man,

"I had a hard time deciding what to do with you, Mr. Lupin. Though, you should know that your gratitude lies solely with the Headmaster, who demanded that you be intact and _alive_ for teaching. Were it up to me, you would be trapped in a silver coffin" Severus pounded his hands on the table and grinned when Remus reacted with a startling jump. "Ten feet below the surface of an abandoned field!"

"Severus,-" Remus began to say before he was cut off

"For a small amount of time I considered exercising my proficiency with the unforgivables. Though I do not wish to incur Harry's wrath, for he somehow, still cares for you." Severus turned around and retrieved something from a large cabinet. "Though I must say Remus, you have surpassed even James and Black himself. Even as children, when they would torment the other students, they never sunk as low as you did yesterday. I rather hope you are ashamed of yourself." Severus said as he set a large intricate bowl on the table. "You see, for several hours, I was thinking about all of the potions I had in store that would not only put you through excruciating pain, but also hide any evidence that I had done so. Finally, I decided that instead of doing anything _to_ you, I would show you exactly what _you_ did. Show you how much _you_ upset the man I care for."

"I care for him as well Severus!" Remus retorted

"Then you may wish to reevaluate your way of displaying it! But for now, I am going to take you into my memory." Severus said the incantation and pulled the whispery silver strand from his temple and cast it into the pensieve. "You are about to witness the events that occurred because of the idiotic words you spouted out of your mouth without thinking" Severus grabbed Remus' forearm and pulled him into the memory where they stood watching and anxious Snape talk to Ms. Granger.

"_About three hours ago Harry stormed out of my office after a rather…difficult discussion with Mr. Lupin. He told me that he would send word yet he has not done so. I was hoping that you would know his whereabouts. I have walked the castle and grounds twice and have yet to locate him."_

Severus guided Remus as the memory of Hermione and Snape played out before them.

"_What do you mean? Is he in danger?" Snape's worry evident on his face_

"_Only from himself. Sometimes he trains so hard he works himself to exhaustion." Hermione began. "But when he trains under anger or worry, well, he pushes himself too far. When Sirius died a few years back, he made the dummies, which were only able to perform low level spells before for the DA, able to perform more complicated spells."_

"_What kind of spells?" Snape said walking past the roving staircase._

"_Well, I talked to him once after I watched him train. He said that in the final battle he would be up against Death Eaters and that would not be using low level spells. He requires the dummies to be powerful; they can perform all but the Killing Curse. He replaces the Killing curse with the Cruciatus Curse; so, if he is hit with that particular curse, then he knows that in real life, he would have been killed. He hasn't had to use the room to control his emotions for quite some time; in fact he only trains once a week any more. Not even his nightmares are bothering him as much."_

Remus' face fell upon hearing that, Severus noticed, the thought about how much more ill Remus would look before the memory was over

"_We are almost there, when you go in, take these." Hermione handed Severus a small pouch. "There are strong pain relief potions, Blood replenishing potions, Draught of Peace for anxiety, antidotes for petrification, as well as some Skele-Gro, antidotes and slaves for burns, cuts, and bruises, and a small bottle of Nerve Replenishing Potion in case of emergency."_

"_Where did you get all of these?" Snape asked_

"_I brewed them myself."_

"_And he would need nerve repair potions for…?" Snape asked curious as he put the pouch in his pocket._

"_Surely, Professor, you are aware of the long term effects of the Cruciatus curse?" Hermione asked_

"_But nerve damage only occurs after more than ten minutes exposure!" Snape nearly yelled_

"_I know, but I have had to use them on more than one occasion. Now let's go. " Hermione said as she crossed the corridor and walked back and forth until a door appeared. "Orion" She cast a silencing spell before peeking through a small hole in the door._

"_What are you doing? We don't have time for this-" Severus urged_

"_We have to make sure he is at a stopping point, or he could get startled and hit us with a hex." Hermione said before looking in. "He is training to music right now, he should be done in a few minutes, and then you can go in when it is safe-"_

"_I am not a child, Ms. Granger. I am quite proficient in defense." Snape said before pulling the door open._

Severus watched the looks on Remus' face as he watched Harry fight, stepping forward to help him before remembering that this was a memory, and that all of this has already occurred.

_Harry threw his wand in the air and yelled, thrusting his hands out to the side as if pushing the enemies away, as they all became engulfed in a large ball of flame, instantly turning to ash and falling to the ground around a panting Harry. The anger in his eyes apparent as he cast a last hex to the one remaining dummy as the song ended, but Harry's eyes went wide as the dummy dodged and he hex hit a box behind. Harry stormed over to the dummy that remained still as Harry thrust his wand into his throat; Harry prepared to cast a spell as the Boggart flew out of the box and behind Harry taking the form of Sirius_

Remus watched on as Severus sprinted full speed to Harry, not stopping, he watched as the Boggart disguised as Sirius walked up behind Harry and put his hands on his shoulder, he watched.

"_Are you afraid Harry? Afraid of one of the few people who cared for you, afraid of the man you killed?"_

_Harry reeled back and faced the all-too-realistic likeness of Sirius. "I didn't kill you!" Harry shouted_

_Sirius' face took on an evil expression of pure anger. "YOU LET ME DIE! THAT'S EVEN WORSE! I'M DEAD! ALL BECAUSE OF YOU, YOU WORTHLESS BOY!"_

"_I didn't mean too! I never wanted you to die!"Harry screamed_

"_It's too late for apologies! I only hope that one of these days, a weakling like you, will finally gain the courage to finally jump out of that tower, once and for all!"_

_Harry fell to his knees in shock, not seeing the dummy behind him cast a Cruciatus Curse at his back._

Panic flowed in Remus' veins as he looked over to see Severus disarm and banish the dummy, still running to Harry.

_Harry writhed on the floor, jerking in pain, as he heard shouts from above him. "No one wants you! Your uncle didn't want you, your aunt, even your own parents. Hell, you are dumber than you thought if you think that Severus could possibly love something as disgusting as you. Your uncle was right; you deserved every beating, every hurtful word. You deserved it all!" The Boggart laughed as Harry gave into the darkness surrounding him; Harry barely heard the loud "__Riddikulus" cast by Severus as his eyes fell closed._

Remus watched as the Boggart's words echoed in his head, tears ran down his cheek, he covered his mouth with his hand to keep from sobbing out loud at the sight in front of him.

_Snape pulled Harry into his arms as he fished the pouch from his pocket pulling out the necessary vials. He brought them to the young man's lips, one by one, massaging his throat to make the potions go down. Severus pulled Harry close against his chest as he rocked back and forth, petting the soft black hair and whispering confirmations in the young man's ear._

"_It's going to be okay, Harry. Everything will be all right. I love you; we can get through this…"_

Like Hermione, Remus watched as Severus rocked Harry back and forth, not moving him until the potions could take effect. He watched as the Potions Master spoke kind, loving, caring words of comfort to Harry.

"_Professor, Harry keeps his invisibility cloak in his right pocket. Cover yourself and take him to Madam Pomfrey. I will tell the Headmaster what happened." _

Remus, like the smart witch, noticed the tears sliding down Severus' face. He looked over at Severus and noticed that he was not crying this time; he instead wore a harsh look of determination, and then Severus turned to look at him as the tears flowed down the tawny haired man's face. And for the first time, Remus begged Severus

"Please, Severus. No more, don't make me watch anymore. I had no idea!"

"You knew that your words would hurt Harry, you hoped that he would give up his relationship with me because you were uncomfortable with it. But, it looks like you were wrong, because neither one of us is going anywhere. Unlike you, I am willing to pick up the pieces after he breaks, and I am patient enough to make sure that he smiles again, after he is put back together."

"I have helped Harry in the past Severus, whether or not you believe it."

"You may have helped, but did you offer your help and support when he needed it most?"

"I offered it every time he hurt."

"I would argue differently."

"And what proof do you have of that? These unfounded accusations." Remus sputtered, angered that the man in front of him accuse him of such things.

"Unfortunately, they are not at all unfounded." Severus said as the scenery of the infirmary rushed around them and a scene from a few hours ago appeared before both men.

Remus watched as Severus asked about what the Boggart said, he watched as Harry confessed that he though of suicide after Sirius' death, Remus cried out loud as he heard Harry say everything about the Dark Lord and about how lonely he felt. Remus realized that, even if he felt like he was there, he never _really_ was when he needed to be. Remus fell to his knees crying, and found himself like that when Severus pulled him out of the memory.

"Severus, I have to go apologize to him, I have to beg his forgiveness." Severus smirked at the absolute brokenness of the man in front of him.

"Indeed, though I would give Harry some space right now. He needs some time to think. And Remus, if you ever hurt Harry like that again, not even the Dark Lord himself could keep me from burying you." Severus said as he walked Remus out of the room and slammed the door, leaving the man crying in the hallway.

* * *

There you have it folks! The long awaited chapter. I thought about punishing Remus in all the ways that Severus did, but knew that Harry would never forgive him, so I had Snape torment him by showing Remus just how much pain he caused Harry. I believe that it was the best way. It may be a while before the next chapter is up. because A.) I have to write it B.) I'm writing tons of papers and studying for the end of school and C.) My husband and I are spending almost all of our spare time moving into our first place. Which is quite exciting since we have been living with friends up until t his point. We will be moved in shortly before our 1 year anniversary in July. Yay!

Also, as a reader pointed out, yes the characters are somewhat out of character. Though i try my best to explain this, or plan on explaining it in future chapters, just note that they will not be exactly like the books because I am not J.K.R.

Hopefully, I did an alright job writing Albus.

Thank You for reading! As always- i love nice reviews!

XOXO Blossoming Nightshade


	11. Forgivness Does Not Come Cheap

I'm so so sooooo sorry for not updating in over a month. I'm so ashamed! *hides face* Please forgive me? Read the short blip at the end of the chapter.

* * *

Remus walked into the infirmary to see harry sitting on the bed, as Madam Pomfrey poked and prodded at him.

"Oh, good morning Mr. Lupin, I'm almost done with Harry here, and then he is all yours." Lupin noticed as Harry looked up at him, devoid of the smile the young man had every other time he saw him. Lupin sat in a nearby chair waiting for the Mediwitch to finish, gathering his thoughts.

"All yours, Mr. Lupin." Lupin smiled at the grey haired witch as she picked up her things and left.

"Hello, Harry." Lupin said hoping to get a greeting from the young man in front of him.

"Hello, Professor Lupin." Harry said not looking up to notice the man's face fall into a sad frown.

"Come on, Harry. Please. I didn't know what the situation was. Can you really fault me?" Lupin noticed Harry glare up at him "guess you can. Look I was stupid, and I'm so sorry…"

"Professor Lupin. I'm not angry at you for not knowing the situation. I am angry at you because you didn't bother to care what the situation was before judging us both."

"Harry, you were kissing Snape, what kind of conclusion did you expect me to jump to?" Harry stood and began to yell at Lupin; neither of the men noticing Severus standing outside the door listening.

"You were not supposed to _jump _to any conclusion, Lupin. You were supposed to listen and be happy for me, like my other friends. Even Ron is happy for me Lupin!"

"Well, maybe it will just take some time. I mean, you have to admit, it is a little unorthodox. Do you even have anything in common?"

"Remus, maybe if you stopped judging him, you would see just how much we do have in common. And despite what you may think, I'm _very_ lucky to have him. Not many people would want to be with someone like me, Remus. I was raped, beaten, starved, and abused at my uncle's house. I'm an outcast, and constantly misunderstood. Very few people want to be friends with me, for reason other than popularity. Surely as a werewolf, you would understand. Imagine that you found someone who doesn't pity you, but actually understands you; some one who likes you, loves you despite what horrible things happened in your past; someone who loves the good and the bad. Would you be picky about their age?"

"I suppose not."

"Now imagine that you have been in love with that person for years. You'd be so ecstatic that the person returned your feelings. Would you not?"

"I would. But I don't see-"

"Now imagine that the person, whose opinion mattered to you most, came in and told you how disgusted they were with you. Imagine them yelling about how ashamed they were. You would be devastated and crushed. I'm not going to be ashamed of my love for Severus, and no one can make me. Not even you. And despite what you may think, Sirius _would _be happy for us. I'm with Severus now, and if you don't like it, then you don't have to be a part of my life. Do you know what he told me? He told me that he loved me. He told me that as much as he wants to be with me, he doesn't want me to be unhappy and if that meant breaking up with me so that you would be happy, then he would do it."

"There's no need for that. Maybe I don't understand, but I believe that I'm beginning to. And yes, it will take me a while to get used to, but if this is what truly makes you happy. Then I suppose that I have no logical reason to object. I'm sorry, Harry. I know I hurt you." Lupin hung his head

"I don't think you realize how badly."

"I do. Severus showed me." Lupin noticed Harry stiffen.

"What did he show you?"

"How horrible I've been. Harry, why didn't you ever tell me that you were thinking of suicide?" Remus tried to display his feelings by enunciating the words with desperate hand gestures.

"It's not exactly something you just bring up at the diner table."

"Harry, I care for you. You're my cub; I wish you were comfortable telling me these things."

"Comfort had nothing to do with it, Remus." Harry said as he stood up and began putting on his shirt.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean…suicidal ideation is just something I learned to deal with. I grew up with it, I adapted, I adjusted."

"You don't just _learn _to deal with those things, you are not _supposed _to."

Lupin cringed as Harry laughed. "You sound like Hermione."

"It got worse after Sirius died…didn't it?" Lupin whispered

"Look, if you are here to apologize please get on with it."

"Right, Harry I'm really sorry. For everything. For yelling at you and not bothering to find out your feelings before shunning you and the person you care about."

Harry's expression gave off the fact that he was bored to tears, and wanted to run.

"I'm also sorry for not being there when you really needed me." Harry's head shot up Glaring at Lupin.

"Harry Sirius's death was _not _your fault!"

Harry glared intently at the wolf in front of him. Warning him to back off.

"Lupin, don't-"

"It was an accident, nothing you did could have prevented-" Harry saw red

"STOP IT! Stop talking about it!" Harry noticed Lupin's surprised face, which prevented him from continuing his yelling. "Please, just stop. You have no idea what you're talking about. So just…don't." Harry began to walk out of the room with Lupin trailing closely behind, managing to grab Harry's wrist in his large hand.

"Harry, please forgive me." Harry looked down at Lupin's hand holding his wrist; he wondered how Lupin had gone so quickly from a man whom he could tell his darkest secrets to a few years ago, to…this. Well, not his darkest secrets, only Sirius knew his darkest secrets, the secrets that he took to his grave; secrets of Harry's sexuality, the person of his affection's even some doubts he had about fighting for the Order of the Phoenix. But none the less, Remus had become just another person to shun him in the Wizarding World; he always believed that he was more like Hermione, loyal to a fault despite personal opinions.

"Auribus teneo lupum" Harry said looking down at Remus who kneeled on the floor in front of Harry waiting for his forgiveness, wondering what it was that Harry just spoke.

"I will either find a way or make a way, but you are forgiven. Goodbye, _Professor_." Harry said casting a sharp look at the older man, who dropped the wrist he held, sighing in relief. Harry promptly walked away, loud foot steps echoing behind him. Remus stood at the entrance to the medical Wing wondering what I was that Harry had said.

"Arribos tineo lupum?" Remus wondered out loud, and then jumped at the sound of Snape's footstep from around the corner not even 5 feet away.

"You need to brush up on your ancient languages Professor Lupin. Auribus teneo lupum. It is an old Latin phrase translating into "I hold the wolf by the ears". I'm sure the irony does not escape you." Severus smirked like the cat that caught the canary. "It means that he is in a dangerous situation and that both keeping hold and letting go could be deadly."

"But why did he say it?" Remus asked believing that something so cold could not have been said by the boy he knew, the boy with the warm, forgiving heart.

"I believe that he fears that in order to hold on to your friendship that he will have to let go of me, and that to let go of your friendship would mean being with me. Contrary too popular belief, I am not a heartless bastard. I want Harry's happiness. I will support whatever decision he makes in regards to his friendship with you, however he would be happiest remaining friends I am sure; though it is still a loss to me as of why." Snape said drawing out the last word as he eyed Lupin up and down. "If you wish to remain on his good side, I suggest that you prove your support of his decisions, _all of them_." Snape finished and turned on his heel; quickly walking away in the direction of the dungeons, robes billowing furiously behind him. Leaving a distraught wolf in his wake.

* * *

I'm so sorry again about not updating sooner. I finished up with school and am battling both prepaing for a vacation, and being the Maid of Honor in my best friends wedding. Lots of crazy time-consuming stuff. But I really do appologize! I get back from vacation in less than 2 weeks. I probably wont be able to update until then. But I most definietly wanted to write something for you (even if it was super short) so that you would have something to read, and hopefully not lose faith in me. Hopefully, if all goes as planned I will be working an my stories over vacations so I hope to have many new chapters up all at once! Yay! But yea- thank you for your patience *bows* and please stick with me. My muse will be more in sinc with me once everything is over. Thank You :D

**My Promise For Next Time: The much-anticipated date between Severus and Harry! I'm going to try and put some juicy parts in there as well.**


	12. Important Authors Note

I know that author notes are not supposed to be counted as a chapter-but I didn't know how else to write this where everyone would see it.

To those of you who read the chapter 12 "I'm sorry" *bows*

All of the negative reviews made me think; and yes, I was honestly displeased with what I had written. It was not in character, the plot was poor, and it was generally boring. I was so worried about updating in a _timely_ manner after vacation, that I didn't honestly was not concerned with anything that _mattered_ to the story. I will hopefully be updating soon. I have to take some time and think about how the story will progress, along with thinking about some of the characters that will be introduced. I really do want to make this a quality story for everyone to enjoy, and that is a difficult thing. So as much as I hate to ask for more time, it is needed to continue this story. Hopefully you will all understand. I need to find my muse again for this particular story.

Thank you to Silverstargirl and Fizzy-Flo who left wonderful reviews, I promise that I will make it up to you, with a much better chapter.

If anyone has any suggestions please feel free to message me. I can't promise that I will include any/all of them but I will most certainly give _all_ of them _serious consideration_.

To whom it may concern: We all appreciate reviews, and while I may ask for reviews, I offer you the time-old phrase; If you have **nothing** nice to say, say nothing at all. I do honestly appreciate reviews, _really_. But if you are displeased with the _entire_ story, that may perhaps be a personal taste and not a reflection upon my writing, there is no need to be genuinely mean, and your reviews have been deleted. I know I am not the best writer, and I know that I cannot please all the people all the time; but this story, as with all my stories, are there for those who enjoy them. I do not appreciate being called a "complete failure". If you do not like my story-then it is not for you and no one is forcing you to read it. If you are displeased with a particular part- then comment and offer me some _**constructive**_ criticism. I also always read my messages, feel free to do that as well. I hate to lock reviews for only those who have an account, but will do so if we cannot all act like respectful adults.

Thank you for everyone who is reading this and enjoying it so far. I appreciate it and am so glad that so many people are reading it and dedicated to it. I get an alert in my e-mail every time someone either marks the story as a favorite or marks it for a story alert. I have to admit that the number of e-mails that I get alerting me each time someone does so, warms my heart. So please don't lose faith. I will keep writing and will not abandon the story. I write this story as much for you as I do for myself, sometimes I just forget that.

Thank You,

Blossoming Nightshade


	13. Let Me Fall

Alright everybody! thank you so much for giving me time to rethink my story and a few other things. I'm crazy busy with college this semester so i probably wont update as often as you (or I) would like, but be patient because I WILL update. *bows* Thank you everyone! your encouragement pushes me forward.

Reviews welcomed!

Yours Truly- Blossoming Nightshade

* * *

Harry quickly walked up to the dorm room and tried to sleep off his anger, though finding that he couldn't sleep when he was this angry, he made his way to the astronomy tower. Weaving his way through the castles stone walls he replayed the previous argument through his head, the part that really bothered him.

"_Suicidal ideation is just something I learned to deal with. I grew up with it, I adapted, adjusted."_

"_You don't just learn to deal with those things, you are not supposed to."_

Harry wondered; was he really truly entitled to happiness? Yes he was happy with Severus, but was he allowed to be happy every day, like Hermione and Ron? Even if he was, how would he even begin to achieve something that seemed so…monumental?

Harry pushed his way into the highest room of the astronomy tower and looked around to find the room empty. He stood near the window, putting his hand on the sides and leaning forward, looking at the green grass, slightly rolling hills, the forbidden forest, the blue sky and the clouds slowly moving across. He closed his eyes and began to sing:

"Let me fall  
Let me climb  
There's a moment when fear  
And dreams must collide

Someone I am  
Is waiting for courage  
The one I want  
The one I will become  
Will catch me

So let me fall  
If I must fall  
I won't heed your warnings  
I won't hear them

Let me fall  
If I fall  
Though the phoenix may  
Or may not rise

I will dance so freely  
Holding on to no one  
You can hold me only  
If you too will fall  
Away from all these  
Useless fears and chains

Someone I am  
Is waiting for my courage  
The one I want  
The one I will become  
Will catch me

So let me fall  
If I must fall  
I won't heed your warnings  
I won't hear

Let me fall  
If I fall  
There's no reason  
To miss this one chance  
This perfect moment  
Just let me fall"

Harry let a stray tear fall down his cheek to the grass below; he sat down exhausted and pulled his knees to his chin, running his hands through his short shaggy hair.

* * *

Malfoy stood under the safety of his Disillusionment Spell. He wondered what Potter was doing up here alone, but if it was Potter, than he assumed that it couldn't be good. He waited for him to set up a trap or have something hiding under his robe, but he just watched in shocked silence as the small boy leaned toward the window and starred at the scenery, singing. Malfoy was at a loss of what to do, but simply settled on staying hidden beneath the safety of his charm; at the very least he could use Harry crying alone in the tower as blackmail or something to taunt him with. Malfoy was relieved that Harry headed off to lunch less than fifteen minutes later, not failing to notice the fresh tears falling down his cheeks.

* * *

Harry made his way down the castle, stopping by a lavatory to wash his face with cold water, freshening up a bit. He looked in the mirror noticing that the fresh face effectively hid the confusion and overwhelming anger still bubbling inside of him. He walked through the doors and noticed that most of the castle was there. He walked in and sat between Hermione and Ginny and across from Ron.

"Hey, mate. How ya feeling?" Ron asked with a mouthful of chicken leg

"Relieved that I don't have to spend another night in the Infirmary." Everyone around chuckled "But I feel fine. Can I get those notes you two took for my classes later this evening?"

"Of course, Harry. They are all ready and organized." Hermione stated proudly.

"Great! Thanks you two, you're life savers!" Harry said being interrupted from talking about Quidditch by a cough from Ginny.

"Harry, there is a Hogsmeade trip in two weeks, and I was wondering if you would like to go Madam Puddifoot's Tea Shop?" Ginny asked confidently already believing the answer was yes

"That'd be nice. Were you planning on joining us, Ron? Herms?" Harry noticed Ron and Hermione glace at each other, exchanging worried looks.

"Actually Harry, I was hoping that it would be a date, just the two of us."

"Oh." Harry said realizing his mistake. "I don't know Gin; I don't think that would be the best idea." Harry stated pushing the small potatoes around on his plate nervously.

"Why not?" Ginny asked curiously

"Well…ummm…why don't you ask Vincent Hoggert from your Transfiguration class? He's nice." Harry said trying to waylay the conversation since he didn't really want to have it to begin with.

"Ask Vincent Hoggert? What are you trying to say Harry?" Ginny said standing up in rage

Harry stood up trying to calm her down, feeling all the eyes in the Great Hall on them "Ginny, you're not really…my type" Harry said softly trying to break it to her lightly, hoping that they could later continue this in the common room.

"Not your type? I've liked you for years and now I find out that I'm not your type! You lead me on and then reject me in front of everyone?" Ginny screamed

"I NEVER lead you on!" Harry replied

"Then what were all of those games of Exploding Snap at Christmas? And the one on one practice for the Quidditch games? What about the time we spent together after Dean and I broke up?"

"It was all friendly-" Harry tried to say before he was interrupted by a screaming red head

"Friends? Friends? Is that all?" Ginny screamed

"Ginny, that's all we'll ever be, friends." Harry tried to explain

"Surely you can't mean that?" Ginny yelled looking on the verge of tears.

"Ginny, there is nothing between us. There never was, and there can't ever be. I'm sorry." Harry said going to put his hand on her shoulder in comfort upon the spoken apology, only to find it slapped away.

"YOU ARE THE MOST CRUEL, HORRID MAN I'VE EVER MET!" Ginny screamed before running out of the Great Hall. Harry stood there in shock, and then slowly sat down, resting his head in his hands and groaning his displeasure.

"Well, I thought that went rather well, all things considered." Ron said before taking a bite of pasta.

"Ron, how could you? Ginny's really hurt, she got rejected in front of the whole school. How could you Harry? You couldn't have been a bit nicer?" Hermione chided

"You think I really wanted to have that conversation in front of the whole school, let alone, to begin with? I didn't even know that she had feeling for me! I feel awful, but I didn't know what else to say, I couldn't let my secrets out in front of the whole school. The Daily Prophet would have a new printing out in under an hour. I'd have reporters knocking down my door asking who I'm dating." Harry whispered.

"You're right Harry, I'm sorry. I'll go talk to Ginny and see if I can't clear things up yea?"

"Alright, but don't tell her. I'll break it to her later tonight, it's the least I can do." Harry said

"Alright, Harry. I'll see you in class later Ron. Harry, take it easy on your last day off." Hermione said before leaving.

"Ron, do you ever stop eating?" Harry asked

"What?" Ron asked with a mouthful of food "I'm Starving." Harry just sighed and walked out of the Great Hall, only to meet a smug looking Malfoy.

"I never thought I'd congratulate you Potter. One less Weasley to ruin my appetite always brightens up my day." The blonde spoke.

Harry wanted to hit him with a hex, but was stopped by a voice in his head, a memory…

"_Lucius, his wife and Draco are like family to me…Try and get along with my Godson… He could use someone outside of Slytherin to befriend"_

Harry hesitantly held out his hand, entire body looking stiff.

"What are you doing, Potter?" Malfoy asked

"I was hoping that your offer still stood." Harry said

"What offer?"

"In our first year, you held your hand out in offer of friendship. I would like to take you up on that offer, if it still stands that is." Harry spoke, not knowing whether this was the bravery that McGonnagall always talked about or the 'Gryffindor stupidity' that Severus used to always infer upon his house. Harry grew nervous as Malfoy eyed him up and down, not bothering to hide his hesitation and suspicion.

"Alright, Potter. But be forewarned, if this is some trick, you will be very very sorry." Malfoy said before taking Harry's hand tightly and shaking.

"No tricks, Malfoy." Harry spoke before he watched Malfoy walk away. Harry was startled by a hand landing upon his shoulder, but was relieved when he looked up to see his lover's face, but that relief was soon replaced with an unexplainable worry.

"You saw what happened in the Great Hall didn't you?" Harry asked

"Indeed, but perhaps we should discuss this in my chambers." Severus said quickly walking in front of Harry and leading the way down into the dungeons.

After several minutes of agonizing silence, Harry stepped through the portrait hole with his head hung low, and closed the door behind him before he was spun around and a hand was under his chin, lips crashing against his in rather possessive manner. After several moments of swirling tongues and Snape pulling Harry impossibly close, they pulled apart.

"What was that for?" Harry asked short of breath.

"You belong to me." Severus growled in his ear.

"I didn't know that you were so possessive, Sev." Harry said chuckling

"Is that a problem?" Severus asked as he kissed Harry on the neck and sucked at the flesh there as Harry moaned.

"No, I'm actually quite liking this." Harry moaned harder and pulled the Potions master closer by his hair, as Severus rocked his hips against Harry's.

'Gods, his hair is not greasy at all, in fact it's very silky' Harry thought

Harry felt his pants tighten as Severus ground his hard member into the young man beneath him. Severus smirked as he heard a loud moan come from his lover, soon followed by a loud "pop". Both men looked over to see a large-eared house elf.

"Dobby! What are you doing here?"

"Dobby is sorry to bother you Harry Potter, but I was cleaning in your room and…"

"What is it?" Harry asked pushing Severus away slightly

"Someone is going through your school trunk, sir." Dobby looked at him with large eyes

"What! Who?"

"Dobby is not sure Dobby should say, sir."

"Dobby, I need to know. Please?" Harry could see the elf's resolve breaking

"Ms. Weasley, Harry Potter, sir."

"Shit!" Harry cried out "Sev, I'll be right back." Harry said before running out of the room…

* * *

Yay! hope you like it. ill try to get the heat between Harry and Sev cranked up a notch here soon. :D


	14. Secrets Revealed

I want to thank all of you for reading my story. I'm trying so hard to update as often as possible. Thank you to all of you who have sent me reviews, and I encourage you to keep sending them. Your suggestions keep me on my toes and give me wonderful ideas for my stories. I would especially like to thank **Peanut1645** and **RogueSakura** for the wonderful heartfelt messages that they sent me. Their messages were so genuine, encouraging, and so completely touching that it made me literally cry. Thank you for the support and belief in me. Every time I see that someone has added me as a favorite author or has marked my story as a favorite, it honestly does make my **entire** day. Thank You. Also I am working on my other stories as well as some new ones, which is part of what is taking up a lot of my writing time. :D

And Now- Confessions of A Different Sort

* * *

"_Dobby is sorry to bother you Harry Potter, but I was cleaning in your room and…"_

"_What is it?" Harry asked pushing Severus away slightly_

"_Someone is going through your school trunk, sir." Dobby looked at him with large eyes_

"_What! Who?"_

"_Dobby is not sure Dobby should say, sir."_

"_Dobby, I need to know. Please?" Harry could see the elf's resolve breaking_

"_Ms. Weasley, Harry Potter, sir."_

"_Shit!" Harry cried out "Sev, I'll be right back." Harry said before running out of the room…_

Harry ran full speed up to Gryffindor Tower, before slowing down so Ginny did not hear him outside the Boy's dorm door. He flicked his wand and threw the door open with a loud crash. He kept his wand pointed at Ginny noticing how many of his precious items were lying on the floor.

"GINNY! What do you think you're doing?" Harry yelled as Ginny got off the floor and cowered backwards while glaring her defiant eyes at him.

"You're hiding something from me, I know it! There has to be someone else you are secretly dating, or a love potion someone used to brainwash you. There's no way you would turn me down otherwise!" Ginny screamed tightening the fists by her sides.

Harry sighed and gently closed the door behind him locking it.

"Ginny, can I talk to you as a friend? Not as a pretty girl or as someone who has an interest in me, but as a friend? I can tell you what's going on, but you have to be calm, okay? You're acting crazy right now." Harry said as motioned for Ginny to sit. She glared at him for the last part of the comment, but she sighed and gave in as he came to sit next to her.

"What I'm about to say can never leave this room. Swear?" Harry asked before holding out his hand.

"I swear." Ginny said as she shook his hand, purple shimmers encompassing their grip, proving that the swear had been bonded.

"Ginny, when I said you were not my type, I didn't mean that I like brunettes better or that I'm into taller girls…"

"Then what did you mean?" Ginny asked dumbfounded

"Well…this is really hard to say…Ginny; you're just not masculine enough for me." Harry breathed out.

"Masculine enough?" Ginny asked as Harry noticed the confusion on her face.

"What I mean is that, I'm in to blokes. I'm gay, Ginny." Harry spoke as she put a hand over her mouth and her eyes grew wide.

"I didn't know." Ginny said putting her hand back in her lap.

"No one but Ron and Hermione know, and they kind of figured it out on their own. You are really the first person I've told, other than my boyfriend, of course." Harry laughed as Ginny joined in.

"Oh, Harry. I'm so sorry. I'll back off, I promise. I've just been in love with you for so long that I was getting impatient and it got out of hand." Ginny looked at her nervous hands for a few moments before Harry leaned over and nudged her with his shoulder.

"It's alright."

"So when did you find out?" Ginny asked

"Several years ago; I started to like a certain man and just thought it was a phase at first. However, after the incident with Cho Chang, it just confirmed what I had already known." Harry said looking more relaxed since it seemed his fight with Ginny was over.

"So, did you just recently start dating him, your boyfriend, I mean?"

"Yes, very recently. I've been in love with him for almost 3 years; I never thought it would actually happen though." Harry spoke with a blissful looks on his face as Ginny giggled.

"What's he like?"

"He's absolutely amazing! He's smart and funny in his own way, he's attractive and wise. He's polite and mature and has the best smile in the world." Harry finished excitedly

"Ok, now I'm a bit jealous." Ginny admitted "But he sounds wonderful, does he have any siblings?" Ginny and Harry laughed.

"No, he doesn't."

"Damn. So what's his name, do I know him?"

"You do know him, but I can't tell you his name."

"What? Why?" Ginny asked

"Because neither one of us can afford it. The Daily Prophet would be all over me, I'd never get a moments peace and neither would he. And I certainly don't need Voldemort to find out who he is. We are trying to play it safe and keep it a secret."

"Well that certainly makes sense. I never thought about it like that before." Ginny spoke

"So, are you still mad at me?"

"Nah. I wish you would have told me you were gay earlier, but we can't change the past. Are you mad at me?" Ginny asked shyly.

"No." Harry said shaking his head.

"Great!" Ginny said hugging Harry.

Both of them stood up from the bed, silently agreeing to go to the Common Area, but as Ginny was about to walk out she turned around to face him.

"I have one more question. It's not Malfoy, is it?" Ginny asked noticing Harry's mouth standing agape and the color drained from his face.

"The disgusted look on your face answers my question." Ginny laughed "And don't worry, I won't tell anyone."

Later on in the evening, Harry snuck out under his Invisibility cloak down to Snape's quarters, after having a close call with both Filch and his rotten cat. He knocked on the door.

Severus opened the door and looked out into the empty hallway when he heard a figure sneak into his room. He closed the door and turned around to find Harry pulling off the cloak messing up his hair even further if possible.

"Harry what are you doing here" Severus asked "Surely you are aware that it's just after curfew."

"I'm aware, but I had homework to do and I did promise you that I would be back." Harry smirked

"Indeed you did."

"Is this a bad time"

"Not at all, I was simply sitting down to read a book. Would you like a glass of wine?" Snape offered

"I'm pretty sure it's against policy for professors to offer the students alcohol."

"Yes, but the rules have never stopped you before. And I'm not asking you as a professor." Severus said striding over to Harry and pulling him in to a quick and passionate kiss.

"I would love a glass of wine."

"What would you like? I have several varieties of red and white"

"I will have whatever you're having." Harry said hanging his invisibility cloak on the coat rack near Severus's door. Snape handed Harry the glass of wine and motioned for him to sit on the couch next to him.

They sat in silence for a few minutes staring at the roaring fire in fireplace in front of them.

"How did things go with Ms. Weasley?" Snape asked

"It went alright, she was a bit psychotic, but it worked out in the end." Harry said thankful that the confrontation was over.

"What did you tell her?" Snape asked beginning to sip his wine

"The truth." Harry finished as Snape froze

"I didn't tell her your name." Harry quickly spoke panicking "I just told her that I was gay and that I had a boyfriend. I told her that I couldn't give out a name for fear of the prophet smearing out names or the Dark Lord capturing you. That should at least lead her to conclude that it's a student." Harry said giggling and drinking his wine, as Snape stared at him with a raised eyebrow.

"I see. Harry?"

"Yes?" Harry said sipping his wine

"I was on my way to see you in the Hospital Wing the other day and happened to overhear a certain conversation." The glass of wine stilled on Harry's lips as his body froze.

"And what would that conversation be?" Harry said setting his wine down.

"The one between you and the wolf; I was standing outside the door."

"I see."

"Harry, please don't be mad at me. I'm simply worried. I never knew that your guardians treated you so…poorly."

"Very few people do. I doubt even Albus knows the extent, but I can't be mad at you. I suppose you had to find out sooner or later."

"Why didn't you tell anyone? We could have found a new home for you!"

"Severus, I grew up believing that I was a freak, an abnormal piece of trash and a waste of space. The only thing that was good about me was my body. While most children's biggest dilemma is what colouring book to use, I worried about whether I was going to be raped, or beaten. I worried about how I would manage to get food if my family decided not to feed me. Getting a new home just didn't seem…possible. Until I found out about the wizarding world, I never thought I would belong anywhere. In the muggle world, it wouldn't matter whether the house I was in was blue with a nice married couple and a few kids, or a yellow mansion with a wealthy businessman; wherever I was I knew two things. That no one was like me, and that I didn't belong. Before I was accepted to Hogwarts, I thought being raped and beaten and starved was normal. After my first year, I put up with it during the summers knowing that if I didn't, they would not send me back home; back to Hogwarts. Almost everything in my life has revolved around survival. Every year Hermione and Ron, take care of me until I'm back to normal. The Weasley's always treated me like family. Mrs. Weasley's always forced me to eat, saying I was too thin, I believe she had inkling, but never asked me about it. Fred and George know because they walked in on me changing one day and saw the bruises and scars. They sat me down and made me tell the whole story. I have a family that cares for me in the Wizarding World, and I have friends that take care of me. I was offered a new place to stay only once in my life, and that was by Sirius, once that was taken away from me…well…I suppose I just gave up. I just put up with it so that I can come back to this world every year, because if this world was taken away from me, I would die inside. I'm actually thinking about talking to Madam Pomfrey tomorrow to see if she would act as a sort of counselor. She offered it after she found out about the rape one day during the beginning of school check-up, and after Sirius died but…I guess I just didn't figure I had enough to live for back then."

"Harry…my father abused my mother and me when I was young. I know where you are coming from. I think you do need someone to talk to whether it Poppy or myself. I just don't want you to be sad anymore." Severus stood up and got on his knees looking Harry in the eyes and holding his hands.

"Harry, I know this is moving a bit faster than we planned, but would you stay with me over the Christmas holidays? I already got approval from Albus for you to sleep in my chambers, so if you would like…you don't have to, but I simply thought that it would be nice." Severus looked into Harry's wet eyes, taken by surprise when Harry launched into his arms.

"Oh Severus! Of course! I would love to!" Severus lay with his back to the floor as Harry lay on his chest.

"Sev? It's Friday night."

"How very astute of you to notice. Why do you bring it up?"

"Because I have to get some beauty sleep if we are going to go have a day together tomorrow."

"A whole day? I thought it was simply a date." Severus said kissing his lovers forehead

"Yes well, I got approval from Albus to be able to go to Hogsmeade to run some errands as long as I go without my glamour so no one will recognize me, and he said I have to have an adult accompany me. Would you like to go with me?"

Severus smiled "It sounds like we have a day together tomorrow. You better go get some rest. Though I do have one more question for you."

"Of course you do, Sev."

"How do you know the names of Hogwarts' House Elves?" Harry laughed and proceeded to tell his boyfriend the entire story of Dobby over the next hour. Needless to say, Severus had his fair share of laughs and could not wait to rub Lucius' face in the fact that he got bested by a 12 year old.

Both men parted for the night with big smiles on their faces.


	15. Overprotective Brothers

Hi everyone! I'm sorry it has been so long. I've got big plans for the next chapter...*wrings hands together*

Also, yes Snape is written out of character, so stop telling me. I am _quite _aware.

Please enjoy, I'm sorry it took so long to get up. Bear with me, Ive got big plans...big plans.

* * *

Severus met up with Harry in Dumbledore's office. Harry had already removed his glamour and looked amazing in tailored gray pinstripe pants, a tight white tee shirt that freely exposed the snake tattoo on his wrist, a fitted black 3 button vest, a green tie and black dragon skin boots. His hair was pulled back into a loose braid that framed his face and accentuated his sharp features. He guessed that there was a glamour over the famous scar since he couldn't see it. Severus secretly wondered whether Harry had any wizarding robes outside of his school uniform but decided not to complain, especially since his current outfit hugged in all the right places.

* * *

Harry turned around at the sound of the door opening, instantly breathless at the sight that beheld him. Severus had removed the protection charm on his hair that he used when brewing potions. His hair was soft and styled into a windblown look that complimented his features, his green shirt with poet sleeves was covered wonderfully by a high necked black vest, that gave off the tiniest hint of old Victorian style. _Of, course_ Harry thought, _maybe it's just because of all those infernal buttons the man insists on always wearing. Though I suppose I can't complain when he looks this good._ Harry noticed the black dress pants and leather boots the man chose. All nicely complimented by the modest outer robes the man wore, made of a black matte fabric on the outside and a dark grey material inside. Severus needs to dress like this more often, although, I do like the idea of keeping him to myself. Harry smiled.

"Severus you look amazing."

"I should say the same to you, Harry. It is chilly out; I do hope you brought a robe to wear."

"I did." Harry said as he pulled on his robe of black fabric with embroidered black filigree, the lining made of silk the same shade as his eyes. Harry tried a couple times to try and tie the ribbon that secured the robe around his neck and failed.

"Allow me" Severus said as he walked toward Harry

"Thank you. I always seem to have trouble with ones that don't have just a simple clasp." Harry said raising his chin to allow Severus' long thin fingers tie an elegant bow.

"There, all done." Severus said as his fingers lingered just a little too long, and their eyes locked. Severus was lost, looking only into those emerald depths, thinking about those pink supple lips, the lips that were growing steadily closer with his own. He thought of what a wonderful moment this was, what a lucky man he was, with Harry's mouth so close he could feel the sharp breathing from the young man on his own lips. His eyes began fluttering closed…

"Have fun my boys!" Dumbledore exclaimed in his usually excited voice.

Severus and Harry parted quickly, both shyly looking down with rose tinted cheeks. Severus coughed.

"Well, Harry, shall we be off then?"

"Yes, of course."

"Okay, hold on to my arm we are going to port key to Diagon Alley so that no one sees you in the castle."

"Alright." Harry said hesitantly, constantly reminding himself that he was safe with Severus.

With a loud pop, both men landed in a cobblestone alleyway at the far end of the town. Severus ran his hands down his outfit making sure he looked nice before looking at Harry. The young man was tense; the muscles in his jaw stood out and his hands were in fists by his side.

"Harry?" Severus asked worriedly "Are you alright?" Severus' worry grew as the young man only nodded.

"What's wrong?" Severus asked as he heard Harry take several deep breaths, relaxing.

"Sorry." Harry whispered "That was the first time apperating since the end of my 4th year."

Severus had been briefed by Dumbledore on what had happened after the boys touched the cup. How Harry faced Voldemort, watched his friend die, saw the ghosts of Lily and James, then appeared in the middle of the stadium. Severus suddenly understood.

"I'm sorry, I didn't know, but why didn't you tell me? I would have had the headmaster arrange something else."

"It's alright; I have to do it sometime, right? Besides, I know that I'm safe with you. Now let's go, I have to pick up some new potions books and would like your opinion. Also, call me Evan." Harry said grabbing the older man's arm and pulling him onto the main street, completely missing the smile on Severus' face.

After several hours of shopping for books, potions ingredients and some new school supplies they walked past Weasley's Wizard Wheezes. Severus was impressed at how mature Harry was, how his etiquette improved so drastically when he wasn't "playing Potter", but no matter how eloquent he was acting he couldn't miss the sparkle in the young man's eye at the unspoken question.

"Fine, but we can't stay long." Harry smiled and dragged Severus in. All manner of flying and whizzing and buzzing things filled the air, the colors almost offensive to the eyes, the noises as varied as a flute to a tuba. Children were running around, parents were trying to keep up, and everyone had a smile on their face.

The twins looked to see who entered the shop and both shouted out "Evan!" before going over and greeting him.

"How ya doin' Evan?"

"Did you hear about Bill?"

"He got a new job in Switzerland."

"Loves it, although-"

"The wife constantly complains, not that we blame her-"

"Yea, we'd be complaining too if we had to spend that much time with Bill."

Harry, Fred and George laughed while Severus could never tell which twin was which.

"Guys, I'm sure you know Severus." Harry said

"Professor." Both men said politely.

"Evan, we have some new product on the table in the corner, go take a look and tell us what you think."

Harry walked away towards the table not noticing when the twins held Severus back from following.

"We have some product to show you in the back, sir."

"Yes, we need some help from a potions master." The twins rushed Severus into the back stock room and closed the door.

"What's goin' on?"

"What do you mean?" Severus asked knowing full well where this was going.

"Look, he has obviously shown you his true appearance, which means one of two things. Either you are dating, or you are on the road down that path. Seeing as you were not holding hands with our little brother when you came in, I'm going to go with the second option."

"Impressive, Mr. and Mr. Weasley." Snape said

"Are you serious about him?"

"Because if you are then that's fine; but if you're not serious for either a long term or lifelong commitment, then end it now and save him the pain."

"I assure you that I am very serious about Harry." Severus reassured the twins, loathe as he was to talk about this, at least it wasn't Albus again.

"Do you love him?"

"I'm not sure if it can be called love yet, but he makes me feel something I've never felt towards anyone before." Severus admitted feeling uncomfortable and exposed.

"From here on out, if you hurt our little brother, you will be exposed to a hell you can only imagine."

"We will give every child in Hogwarts an entire trunk of our products with instructions to use it only on you. And believe me when I say that a Portable Swamp in your classroom is the very _least_ of your worries."

"I assure you that I will treat Harry with the upmost respect and care." Severus said

"Sir, I recommend one thing in regards to your relationship, when he is ready to take the next step, do not do so unless you can tell him with all honestly that you are _truly_ in love with him. If you take that step and those words are left unspoken-"

"It will break him completely." Fred finished.

"Thank you, for your advice Mr. and Mr. Weasley." Severus nodded his head in genuine appreciation

"Call us Fred-"

"And George"

"Very well. I do have one question, something that I have been curious about for quite some time. How did you manage to save up enough money to open up an entire shop right after you left school?" Severus asked wondering if he had somehow offended them, by the way they stared at each-other.

"Harry didn't tell you?" George asked

"Tell me what?" Severus asked

"Of course Harry wouldn't tell him, he never even told Ron and 'Mione." Fred said elbowing his brother.

George shook his head in disbelief, "Professor, he gave us the remaining Tri-Wizard Tournament winnings."

Severus was taken aback wondering if he had heard right.

"The remaining Tri-Wizard winnings?"

"Yea. He spent some of the money on wine-"

"Only round ten galleons-" Fred chimed in

"And got really smashed, I think he was trying to get rid of the guilt he was feeling over Cedric's death. The next day and told us that the Diggory's would not accept his winnings, so he wanted us to have the remaining galleons."

"Why didn't he keep it or spend it?" Severus wondered

"That's what we wondered-" Fred began

"He told us that he believed in us and our products and said that there needs to be a bit of light and laughter in such a dark and dangerous world. He told us that if we didn't take it, he was going to burn it."

"We thought he'd gone marbles-"

"When we asked why he wanted to get rid of the money so badly he just mumbled something about 'blood money'. We promised that we'd never tell who the money came from. We tried to pay him back with the first of our profits, but he refused."

"So we told him that he could have anything in the store for free anytime he wanted."

"He rarely takes us up on our offer-"

"We have to practically throw it at him before he accepts it."

"He's a wonderful little brother, but an even better person."

"He's been through so much with the war and the Dursley's; and the sad part is, I don't think anyone honestly knows the _half_ of it. He's grown into a strong man, but not as strong as everyone thinks, he is still fragile inside. So be careful with him." George warned looking at Severus.

"Yea, or you'll have a whole flock of Weasley's to deal with until you go old and grey." Fred added for good measure.

"I promise that I will do everything in my power to make him feel loved and happy." Severus said rolling his eyes. _How much longer is this going to go on_ he thought.

The three men walked out of the back room and found Harry showing a little boy how to use some of the toys. Harry watched the 5 year old's eyes light up at all the different toys Harry was showing him. Harry took the boy's hand and put several gold galleons into it, winking. He pointed to the Ton Tongue Taffy and told him "I used this on my mean cousin once, he never bothered me again." Harry walked away ruffling the child's hair. (Harry knew it was a lie, but he still enjoyed seeing his cousin like that, and that little boy would have fun as well.)

Harry looked up and saw his date walk out of the back room with the twins.

"Gred, Forge, are you finally done interrogating my boyfriend? Let's go Sev, we have to go before were late for dinner." Harry smiled up at Severus and walked out of the shop with him arm in arm. The twins watched as the couple walked away. George leaned against Fred and pretended to cry.

"There there George, he'll be back." Fred patted his brother's head

"No…it's not that…it's just…they grow up so fast!" George wept for effect before both brothers broke out into hysterical laughter.

* * *

Severus and Harry walked down the street together laughing and talking. Severus shrunk the bags and put them in his robes before escorting Harry into the restaurant.

"Reservations for Snape." Severus said to the host. They walked into the backmost corner of the restaurant in a corner table.

The waitress came by and told the couple about today's specials and asked if they would like to start with a glass of wine.

"I will have the house red wine. What would you like Evan?" Severus asked

"Armagnac, please."

"Very good, sir" The waitress said excitedly.

"I see you are educated in the art of liquor, Evan."

"I would not say educated, simply informed. A hobby I picked up for a short while."

"I see." Severus smiled and cast a silencing bubble around their table. "I know I have said it before, but you do look wonderful tonight, Harry."

"Thank you, Severus. You look breathtaking as well. I like you in colors other than black, black and more black." Harry added

"Thank you for noticing. I had also noticed that the green matches your eyes perfectly. A shame that you did not choose to wear that color on a _regular_ basis." Snape remarked and watched as Harry stilled in the middle of picking up his glass, as he promptly set it back down.

"What do you mean?" Harry asked

"I was privy to a strange rumor that the sorting hat originally desired to place you in Slytherin." Severus smiled, knowing that if this were true, it was something that Harry would try very hard to hide. He picked up his glass and drank.

"Were you now? Where may I ask did you come by such a rumor?"

"A certain grey-haired fool may have hinted at it."

"Fool, being the operative word. But I suppose that there is a bit of truth to every rumor." Harry admitted before taking a much needed sip of his brandy, smirking.

"You admit it then?" Severus asked shocked

Harry sighed. "What use is there in denying it? Yes, the sorting hat originally tried to place me in Slytherin, it said that I could achieve great things in your house."

"Why on earth did you turn it down?" Severus wondered

"On the train to Hogwarts, I made my first friend. Ron told me of the dangers and dark magic that Slytherins and their house possess. Only later did I work out for myself that most of his family was Gryffindor, and that their familial rivals, the Malfoy's, were all Slytherins. I figured out, years later, that magic is only as dark as the caster. Needless to say, that I don't view the Slytherins with the hatred and malice that the rest of the lions do."

"I would hope not, especially since you are dating their head of house." Severus chuckled and Harry joined in. "But the last part you said about dark magic- that is both a very adult outlook and a dangerous belief. Especially in this time." Severus said.

"You disagree then?" Harry asked, wondering his lovers view on dark magic.

"Actually, I agree whole-heartedly, but to the rest of the wizarding world, it is a black and white issue. May I ask how you came to believe that?" Severus asked as Harry buried his face in the menu.

"I suppose after having the curses thrown at you so many times, you rethink things." Harry said hoping to drop the subject.

"To any normal person, that would simply cement the contrasting values of the popular belief. There was something else that changed your mind wasn't there?" Severus pried

"Perhaps we should discuss this over a glass of wine at your place after dessert." Harry said in a rather serious and forced tone.

"Of course, my apologies. So how trained are you exactly in singing?"

Harry blushed, "I took several classes at the school and won several school wide competitions."

"That's amazing"

"Yes, but I only did it to get some scholarship money. I'm not quite fond of tournaments." At this joke both men smirked

"So, you sing only to pass the time?" Severus inquired

"No, I sing when I'm alone to express emotions that I'm feeling but can't put into normal words."

"I hope one day, you would sing for me?" Severus asked and noticed Harry turn a deep scarlet

"Maybe…one day" At this Harry saw Severus smile a very happy smile.

"Harry?" Severus stood from the booth as a soft song came from the band "Would you allow me the honor of a dance" Harry smiled a full smile and walked onto the marble dance floor with Severus.

They danced to slow music and a sultry tango, but when they began waltzing the floor opened up to them.

"Severus, I never knew you were such a good dancer." Harry said

"Indeed, Evan, I have taken many dancing lessons throughout my years. Though it has been many years since I have had a partner to dance with." Severus

"I would have never known it by the way your feet move." Harry said after a particularly embracing spin, completely oblivious to anything not involving the man in front of him.

"Thank you." Severus said, the song began to end and as the last beat stuck the instruments of all the band members, Severus and Harry came together and stared into each other's eyes deeply, each man seeing the deep emotions the other gave away. Their chests were heaving from the intensity of the dance, from the sexual want and need each partner displayed, they looked at each other, and Harry softly whispered

"Severus" into the soft space between them as the whole restaurant broke into clapping. Both men broke apart and bowed before returning to the table, neither noticing several pairs of stormy grey eyes staring at them while dancing.

The dinner ended as well as it began.

"Perhaps you would like to come to my chambers for dessert?" Severus suggested hoping he was not over stepping any boundaries.

"Will there be a fire we can curl up in front of?" Harry asked

"There will be whatever you desire." Severus stated before taking Harry's hand and kissing the fingers.

Both men walked out of the restaurant past the grey eyes that watched their every movement.

* * *

There you go, I hope you like it. It got a bit of course from what I was planning but it will be on track next chapter. Thank you for reading. *bows* please review.

Fact: my husband does not know i write fanfiction. Heehee


	16. A Little Bit Broken Inside

Hi, folks. Sorry it took so long to post this, what with school and all. But here it is! It's a bit Lemony, but that's what we all love, right? Some Plot in this chapter that will play a big part in other chapters, and next chapter will just be _fun_! Enjoy. Oh, and as always, I enjoy awesome reviews and constructive criticism. Thanks everyone.

* * *

Harry walked into Severus personal chambers and noticed that they were not as green as he would have believed, yes the man had several Slytherin green accents but overall it was creams and cozy browns. How had Harry never noticed before? Severus took Harry's outer robe and hung it on a coat rack near the door.

Severus magically moved the couch closer to the cold fire place and Harry's eyes lit up as the man cast a spell that made the cold wood logs burst into a roaring, crackling fire. Severus sat down as Harry sat close and leaned into him and soon two glasses of wine were floating in their direction and a large plush blanket was being pulled onto the two men.

"So, Harry, we have the wine and the fire…"

"Yes?"

"I believe you have something to tell me. Something that I am very curious about."

"Which is?"

"How did you come to believe what you do about light and dark magic?"

"Oh, yes." Harry said, he knew what Severus referred to the moment he asked, but Harry had hoped that he was going to ask about something else.

"Well," Harry began "I suppose it really began when I started the D.A."

"Oh, the stories I have heard about that…" Snape teased

"Yes, well, I suppose that I began thinking about how the intent was really the "darkness" behind the spell and not the caster. I admit, I obsessed over that revelation for weeks, even went so far as to lose sleep over it. I stayed up at night thinking about it, conjuring scenarios in my mind to disprove that theory, but while few extreme scenarios stood alone, my musings did nothing but further prove the growing belief that I held. I talked it over with Hermione and Ron and Ron lost it, I agreed with him and ended the conversation. A few days later Hermione came up to me after dinner and we sat alone for several hours just talking about it, I told her what I was beginning to believe and she told me that while she did not agree whole-heartedly, she did understand. She also told me that my line of thought was very dangerous and could get me in big trouble with the other students. She told me that many traditional and pure-blood wizarding families such as the Weasley's believed this train of thought to be a threat to their beliefs. She told me that if I ever needed to talk about it that I could come to her, but it would be best not to discuss it with other students, even the ones in the D.A."

"Yes, but at dinner you hinted to an experience that cemented the belief."

"I'm getting to that. At the end of that year The Dark Lord sent me a vision of Sirius being trapped at the Ministry, he was dying."

"If this is too hard to talk about Harry, you don't have to…" Severus offered despite his curiosity

"No, you need to know, besides you know most of the story anyway so it's not like I have to go through the entire night."

"Most of the story? Harry Dumbledore told me every single detail that happened that night. Even how Black died."

"Yes, but Albus had not yet arrived at The Ministry at that point, until he did the only memories of those he had to go by were firsthand accounts."

"Harry, he questioned each and every Order member and all of your friends, they swore that they had not left anything out." Severus told Harry, he had to admit, he was confused.

"You're right, they didn't." Harry told him plainly.

"Then I don't understand what your point is."

"_They_ didn't leave anything out, they told Albus everything that they saw and experienced. However Albus never second guessed _my_ account, never asked _me_ to swear an oath. I think he believed that since I knew I had caused my own Godfather's death, there would be nothing to hold back. He also may have been giving me a big benefit of the doubt since I was grieving."

"So, you lied to Albus?" Severus was shocked

"I never lied, per say, but I may have not told him the entire truth." Harry smirked

"Slytherin indeed." Severus said surprised

"Well, you have to understand. After what happened, I was so confused about who I was that I didn't want Albus know how much I doubted myself, and I was proud of my action, but that pride is what I was ashamed of, not the action itself. I didn't know if I was becoming more like the Dark Lord or if this was just what happened when I let go of my self-control." Harry looked down at his hands, not even noticing anything around him. He didn't notice how his fingers fidgeted or how he was slightly pale, nor did he notice the worry in Severus' eyes, Harry was lost in his past.

"After Sirius fell into the veil, I tried to chase him, but Remus caught me before I could follow him. After a few moments I broke free, each Order member and D.A. member was fighting against their own Death Eater, but I didn't care, I couldn't care. I only had two cares in the world; one was that my only family, my only hope of a normal life, was gone, he was killed. The second care in the world, well, I was chasing her down a hallway. I managed to see Bellatrix slip out of the room from everyone and followed her, running at full speed, spinning around corners, dodging under her sloppy hexes. Looking back on it, the only thought going through my head was revenge, the only feeling was pure hatred, everything else was a void, it had all been ripped away by the monster in front of me. She ran down the halls screaming in her shrill voice "I killed Sirius Black!" She was proud, excited, and that made the hatred grow all the more. I threw a hex at her and she tripped, landing splayed on the floor, out of breath, but happy. She wasn't even scared of me, and in that moment she should have been, because at that point even I was scared of myself. She laughed; she taunted me, called me weak. I cast my first unforgivable at her. She laughed and threw it off. She told me that I had to mean it and that I was nothing but a weak boy. I remember the fear in her eyes as I cast her wand across the large hallway and jammed my wand into her throat. I whispered to her, asking her "If I am so weak, why has Voldemort not killed me yet?" Her eyes burned with anger, she spat on me, and called me a worthless whore. It was like fighting with my uncle all over again. I felt the anger bubble to the surface, unable to rein it in, I let it take over. I cast another Crucio at her and I meant every painful syllable of that curse. I watched her scream and writhe on the floor, but it wasn't enough. I wanted her dead more than anything, but my anger took over and I cast a Crucio again, in Parseltongue. She screamed for several minutes, her body lifting off the floor on several moments, she clawed at her skin until it bled. There was blood staining the floor, and for a moment I felt sorry for her, but then I remembered Sirius' eyes as he was ripped away from me. I knew in that moment that living was more painful than death, and that I had made the right decision. I watched for a few moments longer as she screamed; I could actually hear her throat getting raw, her faced was drenched with her tears as she cried on the floor, screaming, convulsing, clawing at her skin, and pulling her hair out. I stood there enjoying it, enjoying her pain in exchange for the pain she caused me. But it wasn't the blood and tears, or even the multiple cracks of her skull pounding against the marble floor that broke me out of my anger; it was Hermione's voice calling for me. She was screaming, looking for me. I lost focus on the spell and it cancelled, but I will never forget Bellatrix's face as I walked away from her, her eyes were full of fear, and I truly believe that if she was not in such pain she would have scrambled to get away from me in that moment. But I just walked away, not looking back at her shaking, tearful, terrified form; I was running to find my friends until Voldemort found me first and Dumbledore showed up moments later. Everything that I told Dumbledore was _true_, except for those few minutes when I was alone with Bellatrix, and I let my anger take over and control me. When I proved to her that I was every bit as powerful as Voldemort, and showed her that I could be just as unforgiving as her master _any day_. Dumbledore found out later of course, I had told him, I could never hide anything like that from him for long. I saw fear in his eyes after I told him and showed him my memory, but unlike Bellatrix, the fear in his eyes wasn't _from_ me but _for_ me. He knew why I hadn't told him earlier, he knew what I thought of myself at that point. He spent several months reassuring me that I wasn't a monster like I believed, but just a powerful wizard who lost control in an unfortunate situation. After that he helped train me, so that I wouldn't be tempted by the anger and hatred again. It only happened once, but I will never forget that night. I have never before been so terrified of myself, but when I wept in Albus' office I remembered something Sirius had told me only days before. He said "I want you to listen to me very carefully, Harry. You're not a bad person. You're a very _good_ person, who bad things have happened to. Besides, the world isn't split into good people and Death Eaters. We've all got both light and dark inside us. What matters is the part we choose to act on. That's who we really are." That is what cemented my beliefs, because I want to believe that I am a good person, I think that I am. Deep down, not just "Potter" but "Harry" as well. Good people can cast dark spells, and dark people can cast good spells; it's not the spells _or_ the people, it is their _intention_." Harry finished and stared down at his hands, afraid to look up into his lover's face, afraid of the rejection he would see in those eyes, or even worse, the fear.

Severus knew what was going through the young man's head, and he put his slender fingers under Harry's chin and made him look into his eyes.

Harry wanted to gasp, there was no fear, not even rejection, but there _was_ understanding. Harry nearly cried out of happiness.

"Then you won't reject me?"

"No, Harry, not in a million years. I have to admit that I am a bit shocked. Not in the bad way. I'm surprised that you cast an unforgivable yes, but I'm so glad that my partner is someone who is not only young and beautiful, but more mature and wise than most adults that I know. I feel so very touched that someone as wonderful as you could love someone like me. I guess I never imagined that we would have this much in common." Severus admitted, he hated rambling like this, it wasn't like him. But he decided that it was worth it the moment he saw Harry smile bigger than he had ever seen before. Harry launched at the older man and threw his arms around him. Severus knew that he found the man he would want to spend the rest of his life with. Someone who has been through just as much Hell as he has, _and_ understands him the way no one else does; someone who will never judge him.

Harry kissed the man in front of him and moaned after the man turned it more passionate, their tongues swirled and mapped out each other's mouths. Harry's hands rested on Severus' strong, wide, shoulders and Severus' hands held Harry neck as his thumbs gently stroked his cheeks. After several minutes of moaning and thrashing Harry fell off the couch and onto the floor, with Severus landing gracefully on top of him.

"Oh Merlin…"

"Are you hurt?" Severus asked worriedly

"God, no that was…really hot." Harry blushed

Severus smirked and had a feeling that he knew what Harry meant. The older man ground his erection against his younger lover and both men moaned.

"Merlin!" Harry yelled as Severus relentlessly rubbed their members together.

"Mmm…just call me Severus." The older man said while attacking the younger one's neck, biting down hard and licking the spot afterwards.

"Sev, I thought you wanted to take this slow?" Harry asked

"I thought I did to, but I just want to taste you so badly." Severus admitted picking up his wand and casting a spell that had their shirts laying several feet away folded up on the couch.

"Sev…you're beautiful." Harry moaned as the man tweaked his nipples. God, it was like the man knew all his erogenous zones.

"You are breathtaking, Harry." Severus kissed down his neck and past his chest, circling his tongue at the man's belly button. Harry seemed to like this so he continued on doing this as he gently unzipped the man's pants, revealing a trail of dark hair that led down to something far greater. He pulled down the pants with his boxers and Harry's hard member sprang free in all its glory. Severus almost gasped, none of his one night stands had ever been _this_ well endowed. He took the member and ran his fingers down it admiring it before wrapping his fist around it and pumping slowly.

"Ahhh…Sev!" Harry gasped thrusting his hips to meet the man's thrusts. Severus placed a hand on either hip and held him down. Harry looked at him and whined, before Severus took all of Harry into his mouth and began sucking. Harry moaned and ran his hands through his lover's silky hair. "Oohhhhhh" Harry cried as Severus began to focus on his throbbing head for several moments before taking everything into his mouth again. Once Harry stopped moving his hips, a stray hand began playing with his balls, rolling them and pulling on them, after several more minutes Harry was ready to come, but pushed Severus off, ripped off his own pants and began to unbutton Severus'.

Harry played with the man's nipples, biting down, then massaging away the pain with his tongue. He pulled off the man's pants and held the large member in his hand, Severus was slightly bigger than Harry. The young man wasn't quite sure how this would ever fit in him but moaned at the thought and began furiously fisting the older man's long, thick member, bringing his head down and pulling the man's balls into his mouth, tongue circling, flicking and massaging the package before Severus pulled him roughly by his hair and into a heated kiss in which Severus took his position back on top. He kissed the man under him and brought their erections together and began pumping them both with one hand while his other arm held him up.

"Sev!" Harry cried out as he dug his nails into his lovers shoulders, the man on top knew his green eyed beauty was close, just as he was. He shamelessly thrust against the man under him for more friction as he whispered in his young lovers' ear.

"Look at me, I want to see your beautiful green eyes as you come all over my hand. Come for me Harry." Severus whispered in his silky voice and that was all it took

"SEVERUS!"

"Harry!" They both were shooting their white streams over Severus hand and onto Harry's stomach and up past his chest. They both looked at each other, silently asking if either had gone too far, but the kiss afterward proved neither had and that they not only both had wanted it, but they both enjoyed it, if Severus sensually licking Harry's come off his hand was anything to go by.

After Harry had cast a wandless and wordless cleaning spell over them both they laid under the blanket by the fire happily, just touching each other and exploring their bodies more closely.

"I thought you said that you never had relations with a man before, Harry?"

"I haven't."

"Merlin, you are amazing." Severus stared at him lovingly

"I'm glad you enjoyed it, I was nervous that I would do something wrong." Severus chuckled in his velvety baritone

"No, Harry, you did everything perfectly. I've never had anyone go down on me like that before." At this Harry smiled, it turned out that he could be Severus' first for a few things as well.

After several hours they dressed and parted ways, despite the reluctance on both parts, but it was agreed that they would be going out next weekend for another date.

* * *

Well, there you have it and there you are. lol. Anyway, i will hopefully have the new chapter up somewhat sooner. I'm working on it now.


End file.
